Health, Embarrassing and Injury: Rock on!

Rock on!

By wtf - 08/03/2012 09:03 - United States

Today, I was jamming out and playing some air guitar. I somehow managed to knee myself directly in my left eye socket. I now have a hideously swollen face and a black eye. When people ask me what happened, I'll be hesitant to tell the truth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 841

You deserved it 24 511

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
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Same thing different taste

By SteveBassist - 27/03/2018 15:00

Today, while playing on stage, the singer of my band swung his microphone around, straight into my face. I now have stitches above my right eye, and a job interview in three days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 932

You deserved it 304

Rain check?

By Egtat216 - 29/07/2016 22:03 - United Kingdom - Aberdeen

Today, whilst tuning my guitar, one of the steel strings snapped and hit me in the face. Now I'm on my way to my first date with the girl of my dreams, and I'm wearing an eye patch and have a thick red line across my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 410

You deserved it 1 476

By failedmusician - 03/06/2009 10:06 - New Zealand

Today, my band went to play a set for the first time. I'm the drummer. All was going well, and then before our first song I threw the sticks in the air, went to catch them, and one hit me right in the eye. I couldn't continue playing. Now I have to wear an eyepatch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 714

You deserved it 59 057

Healthy lifestyle choice

By Rowaelin16 - 23/09/2016 03:31 - United States - Crystal Lake

Today, in an effort to be fitter, I joined a Pilates class. Ten minutes into it, I dropped a 10-pound dumbbell on my face. I now have a horrific looking black eye, and half of my cheek is a mottled green color. Not to mention the cut above my eye that needed 4 stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 824

You deserved it 1 610

Wardrobe malfunction

By Unknown - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I decided to wear a tight, long-sleeved shirt that showed off my body. As I was trying to roll up my sleeves, I realized how tight the shirt really was. It wouldn't budge past my elbow, and I tugged so hard I ended up punching myself in the eye. I now have a swollen, black and blue eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 792

You deserved it 37 385

By alycion - 17/06/2019 19:07

Today, I woke up with my face flying at the wall. A muscle spasm had caused me to pop out of bed. I'm now dealing with a concussion and sprained neck, thanks to an almost physically impossible feat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 677

You deserved it 133

Lumpy

By popeye - 25/02/2010 15:18 - United States

Today, I was trying to take the cap off a can of spray cooking oil. It was really stuck so I pulled extra hard. It flew off and I punched myself in the head. I also sprayed myself in the eye with it. The lump on my forehead and my swollen shut eye make me look like Popeye, but I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 104

You deserved it 5 359

By mildlyconcussed - 10/08/2015 08:32 - Italy - Somma Vesuviana

Today, I went to a gig. The drummer threw his drumsticks out at the end and I managed to catch one. With my face. Not only did I get a black eye, but the person next to me snatched the drumstick from my hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 660

You deserved it 1 906

It's not a phase, mom!

By Anonymous - 24/12/2009 23:35 - United States

Today, I woke up to see that I had two black eyes from a cheerleading stunt gone wrong yesterday. I decided to curl my hair to distract from them. While curling my hair I accidentally burned my cheek. I now have two black eyes and a huge burn on my cheek. My extended family is coming tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 873

You deserved it 7 268

By JimiHendrix - 01/03/2013 01:55 - France - Luynes

Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 976

You deserved it 7 360

OnlyOnFML 0

Thursday 8 March 2012 15:57

The tough life of a guitar hero...

causticgirl 6

Thursday 8 March 2012 15:57

Yeah, I'd come up with a better story for that black eye. Make it a good one. Maybe something involving a mugging with 2 attackers.

Comments

DocBastard 38

Thursday 8 March 2012 16:02

When someone asks you what happened, all you need to say is, "You should see the other guy!"

skinthesnakes 6

Thursday 8 March 2012 16:06

I feel like with a clumsy as Op is they might state "you should knee the other eye".

thenomad 7

Friday 9 March 2012 0:17

I had a patient once who had end stage dementia. She forgot that she could no longer walk and fell out of bed onto her face. She was bruised pretty badly on the right side of her face. She was very upset about it one night so I told her to tell everyone, "you should see the other guy." everyone's humorous reactions made her feel less embarrassed about the bruises, and we could all laugh about it together.

MeLuvBewbs 7

Thursday 8 March 2012 16:03

Say your guitar hit you in the eye

sarahbear992 6

Thursday 8 March 2012 16:04

mhmm I'd be pretty damn hesitant my self too. :P

Michyxo 14

Thursday 8 March 2012 16:04

Haha yeah, make up something awesome! My boss advised me to do the same when I sprained my ankle in a less-than-dignified way. He told me to go the bar fight route.