Obviously roofies happened in between.

YOU happened. Before, after and in between. And you're the only one to fix this problem that you brought upon yourself. Own up to your responsibilities and don't hide behind the blissful ignorance of alcohol/drugs/bad friends induced oblivion...

Why the hell are you drinking in a bush?

I seriously don't know how you could have thought this was fyl. That's like saying I put a gun on my arm and pulled the trigger. FML

Go to an AA meeting. You'll find your answers there, plus you'll hear a lot of stories that make your drunken crime spree sound like a silly prank.

At least you know trashy behavior from mature, responsible behavior. Hey, you had fun. I'm sure you'll get your shit together and grow from that but it'll be a fun memory to laugh about later.

I feel bad for whatever poor person owns the business you robbed.

It's all fun and games and unamusing FML posts until the police knock on the dorr and you end up in prison. Stop being an idiot.

That's funny shit. Even better that you try absolve yourself of any responsibility!

Reminds me of the movie "hangover part 2".