Miscellaneous: Today, I bought an electric toothbrush because they're supposed...

By Anonymous - 25/01/2015 07:01 - United States

Today, I bought an electric toothbrush because they're supposed to be a lot healthier than regular ones. My crazy religious mom immediately called me a whore and said she knew what I really wanted to use it for. So that's $80 in the trash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 520

You deserved it 2 844

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Get me out of this shithole

By nothing is sacred - 23/02/2017 12:00 - United States - Reynoldsburg

Today, I caught my mom using my toothbrush and washcloth again, despite her having both her own bathroom and supplies. I asked her to please not use mine, to which she called me an ungrateful bitch. My dad agreed. Yet they wonder why I've been desperately saving money to move out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 547

You deserved it 498

Priorities

By Anonymous - 09/07/2021 13:01 - United States - Floral Park

Today, my mother flipped out that I spent $20 on a gift for myself for my birthday. Instead of getting a gift for me, she spent $300 on a new vacuum cleaner, and claims that we didn't have enough left in our budget to spend on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 996

You deserved it 129

By Nikse - 29/07/2009 07:23 - United States

Today, I was at the store with my mother in the facial care section. I found this device that scrubs your face with those anti-bacterial pads. The aisle was crowded and noisy, so I shouted to my mother, "Can I have this vibrator thing?" It went silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 356

You deserved it 52 039

Jesus saves!

By that’s just gross - 20/06/2021 13:01

Today, I’ve always tried to be understanding that my girlfriend grew up very poor and is therefore extremely frugal. However, I finally had to draw the line when she flipped out on me for throwing out her respooled used dental floss and buying another. It was 98 cents for a new one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 102

You deserved it 94

By Bad Child? - 08/04/2017 16:00

Today, as I was brushing my teeth, I heard my mum praying to God to help her "get rid of such a stupid child". I have no idea what I've done wrong, and she's refused to talk to me all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 814

You deserved it 433

By jess - 30/04/2009 04:51 - United States

Today, I had a dentist appointment after class so I threw my electric toothbrush in my backpack so I could brush my teeth before. In the middle of class the toothbrush turns on and the vibrations could be heard throughout the classroom. They yelled at me "Jess has a vibrator!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 148

You deserved it 10 124

By SLAB_GIRL15 - 01/08/2012 07:59 - Australia - Port Macquarie

Today, I cleaned the toilet so vigorously that I snapped the handle of the brush. I laughed and told the rest of my family. Instead of joining in on the hilarity, my mother screamed, "We have had that toilet brush for twenty-six years!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 446

You deserved it 3 086

Get out of my house

By EstefanP - 13/05/2022 14:00

Today, I walked in on my mother-in-law teaching my 11 year-old daughter how to purge herself using a toothbrush. Her logic is that, “If she gets fat, she’ll never get a boyfriend.” She sees nothing wrong, and bitched at me for messing with her future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 295

You deserved it 136

By thechaos - 15/12/2014 22:24 - United States - Pittsfield

Today, my family got into a massive argument about whether or not battery-operated toothbrushes are considered electric toothbrushes. Everyone is in their own room and refuses to talk to each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 613

You deserved it 4 241

By Anonymous - 20/04/2016 14:34 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, after a fight, I caught my sister rubbing my toothbrush on the inside of our grimy toilet. This is why I have trust issues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 155

You deserved it 1 563

Welshite 39

Monday 26 January 2015 0:05

How dare you clean your teeth using devil magic! Batteries are formed using the spit of Satan. You'd better start praying for salvation right now.

ToTheThighs 6

Monday 26 January 2015 0:04

I'm sorry op. I love my electric toothbrush, it's great for my teeth

Comments

HeWillBeLoved105 22

Monday 26 January 2015 0:58

Who the **** pays 80 dollars for a tooth brush? Also, if your mom is that crazy, why would you ever let her see it? You kind of deserve it.

Jinxsie 27

Monday 26 January 2015 4:19

No child deserves this.

TallMist 32

Sunday 26 April 2015 20:18

No. She does not deserve to be called a ***** (By her own MOM, btw, which is just wrong) and lose out on $80 for buying an expensive toothbrush.

utlanning 9

Monday 26 January 2015 1:05

You should buy a vibrator and say you're going to brush your teeth with it.

chikinscratch00 8

Monday 26 January 2015 1:09

#hitachiforthemouth

GunSlinger69 19

Monday 26 January 2015 1:09

Since when is religion against masturbation? I thought it was just pre-marriage sex?

Morning_fml 22

Monday 26 January 2015 2:16

Religion has always been against masturbation because it basically destroys the whole point of procreation, and masturbation is generally classified as being lustful and having immoral desires.

saffy66 34

Monday 26 January 2015 1:21

She's giving herself away there - why would she think that of you unless she's done it herself? I hate it when people push their own hang ups onto their kids.

Ray_of_midnight 22

Monday 26 January 2015 1:21

"Wanted"? More like *had*. There's a reason she knows, and suspects, this. Takes one to know one.

sparkledoge 29

Monday 26 January 2015 1:31

For a religious woman she has a some suspicious ideas...

gobiteme2 34

Monday 26 January 2015 1:35

You should really freak you’re mom out and told her it was for “Anal”. Next time she will keep her thought to herself.

laden_swallow09 34

Monday 26 January 2015 7:59

Or mummie dearest will just slap her and send her off to a convent. There's no reasoning with crazy.

brendejafulable 41

Monday 26 January 2015 1:48

Tell her to back off.

siggy_mcsigx 22

Monday 26 January 2015 1:56

It makes me so angry when parents force SHAME on their children's sexuality just URGHHHH. I am so dearly thankful my parents are open minded (just don't care).