By Live Sweet - 25/04/2013 05:33

Spicy
Today, I finally hooked up with the guy that I have been in love with forever. If there is such a thing as soul mates, this guy is it. He's my best friend in the whole world. It was the worst sex I have ever had. FML
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You deserved it 14 775
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

glosniks 5

Sex isn't everything! He'll get better, maybe it's his first time.

634 6
Magicomoo 9

Everybody can learn, just be honest and work on it in a nice way. Its about creating good experiences :-) sex can always be improved if you talk! good luck!

248 4

Comments

pandabrr 12

Practice makes perfect? ... *edit* someone already said that.... hmm PRACTICE

3 2
perdix 29

#26, yes, but you have to slog through piss-poor, tedious, mediocre, passable, and decent, until you get to amusing, stimulating, potentially orgasmic, singularly orgasmic, multiply orgasmic and mind-blowing and then you end up at perfect. She may have the patience to tolerate all that shitty sex, or just find a guy who knows what he is doing.

9 3
SystemofaBlink41 27

I was going to say that last thing you said was shallow, but since your comments are usually coated in a thick layer of sarcasm, I'm just going to thumb you up.

1 3
Jaxx66 21

Oh but perdix, it's so worth slogging through it to see your comments. Now if I could find that Ninja-nun and the Doc, my return will be perfect.

2 1
ScenicSubterfuge 39

That shouldn't be worth saying if he really is that important to you:/

7 4
gioo_fml 6

You were probably the one who made it the worst sex....give it time sex isn't everything

5 6
flockz 19

unless you are a male praying mantis. then sex is everything.

10 1
Raesin 21

So communicate OP, learn how you can make it better and let him know what he can do to please you. An important part of great sex is communication, if you just carry on without saying anything, it just makes you both unhappy with it... forever.

4 2
rattusrattus 18

*whips out flipchart* *indicates parts with stick* This is the ********! Lick it! Touch it! Rub it! This is the ******! Insert phallic objects into it! When inserting phallic objects, do not forget to stimulate the ********! *flips page* This is the neck. Bite it. Bite it hard. Then kiss the bite. Then bite it again. *flip* This is my butt. Squeeze it and grab it! *flip* This is Tolkeinian cutlery. It is blunted. Run it across my back! *flip, et cetera* (Semi-accurate representation of RattusRattus's sexual partner training)

15 2
anon_e_m00se 8

Mmmm... biting and blunted cutlery... my kinda girl :-)

3 1
RedPillSucks 31

Sounds like an Ikea sex manual. I'm afraid to ask or google Tolkeinian cutlery

2 0
K410 18

Maybe he just needs some more practice ;)

2 3
RuskiManBearPig 4

Only way from the bottom is up hehe

4 2
Acik91 26

He's your best friend, so I guess your communication is working - it's not going to be that hard to turn him into your perfect lover, it just takes patience, willingness and time!

2 5
darth1 18

I have no sympathy for you. If that's really such a big deal then give him tips, have practice sessions. Sex isn't everything, people like you sicken me.

11 8
Giluh 19

There is way more to love than sex. If you base a relationship on how good the sex is, your never going to be truly happy. If you really love him, then it wont matter to you.

12 2
x24x 10

He might have been nervous because he feels the same way about you. Give it another go. It'll improve.

6 1