By Lauren - 20/08/2012 03:53 - United States - New Market

Today, I had to bail on yet another date with an awesome guy. Every time I make a date, my hateful mother slips laxatives into my food so I'm glued to the shitter until 2am. This is the fourth time. FML
I agree, your life sucks 37 694
You deserved it 4 178

Same thing different taste

Top comments

giantsfan2010 23

You haven't caught on yet? Just don't eat the food.

Comments

Next time you have a date, only eat out all day!

I haven't read the previous comments yet so I could just be repeating what's already been said (if I am I apologise)..... Why on earth do you keep telling your mum you have a date?? Please, for the love of god (and your digestive tract) stop telling her..... :0) xx

Tell him you felt sick, set up another date and dont eat

She is essentially poisoning you. I would tell her that you are going to the police or cps.

Hey, ever occur to you to not eat or drink anything your hateful mother touches,hmmm

skyeyez9 24

What a scandalous bitch. A BITCH! Wth

If this is the 4th time then you need to wise up and either not tell her you're going on a date or not east the food she gives you leading up to the date. You deserve our for letting this happen to you 4 times.

This is what you should do: the next time you have a date tell her it's four days before it is. Then when she puts it in her food, eat it and shit all over everywhere and "pass out" so she has to clean it up. Then call social services and say that you passed out because she put laxatives in your food and she didn't notice because she was cleaning. THE PERFECT TRAP