Miscellaneous: Today, I had to pick my grandma up because she was drunk, at...

By Anonymous - 13/02/2012 01:11 - United States

Today, I had to pick my grandma up because she was drunk, at church, at 9am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 403

You deserved it 2 502

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/06/2019 20:00

Today, I had to go pick up my mother at 3 in the morning. She had been out drinking and couldn't drive. She parties more than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 456

You deserved it 228

By my cheese grater + your dick - 17/01/2014 17:35 - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, my grandma said, "I know you don't have any plans tonight. Do you want to go to bingo with me?" I said sure out of pity, and ended up being her designated driver after she got wasted later in the evening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 140

You deserved it 5 311

Drunk level: 2000

By morningbirdie - 20/09/2020 14:01

Today, I had to pick up my dad because he was too drunk to drive home. Drive his wheelchair home, that is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 200

You deserved it 99

By driverboy - 31/12/2014 08:08 - United States

Today, I had to pick up and drive home a couple of drunk bitches. Unfortunately, one of these drunk bitches was my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 914

You deserved it 4 878

By Congrats to me - 24/05/2014 23:57 - United States - Canton

Today, the only person in my entire family to show up sober and on time to my graduation was my grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 716

You deserved it 4 153

By Anonymous - 09/05/2015 20:50

Today, my drunk grandma flashed me, after confusing me, a 19 year old girl, for my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 913

You deserved it 2 355

By Anonymous - 02/09/2019 04:00 - New Zealand - Invercargill

Today, during a family reunion, my 89 year-old grandma stood up and drunkenly made a speech about how ashamed I should be of myself for still being single. She then passed out at the table. Half my family got up to help her, the other half whispered in agreement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 810

You deserved it 164

By kylie18xx21 - 01/02/2013 15:26 - United States

Today, I had to leave my ACT prep class ten minutes in to pick up my drunken father from his best friend's baby shower. I picked him up along with a bill for the damage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 462

You deserved it 2 306

By nyebust - 01/01/2011 05:18 - United States

Today, my grandmother drunk dialed me at midnight to wish me a happy new year. I was already in bed. My grandmother has a better social life than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 215

You deserved it 8 144

By Anonymous - 09/05/2009 16:49 - United States

Today, I had to pick up my drunk mom at bar. While we were driving home, she thanked me over and over again, and then said, "Thank god you have no life!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 738

You deserved it 4 507

DontClickOnMe 28

Monday 13 February 2012 9:01

Sounds like a cool grandma.

disco2466 8

Monday 13 February 2012 9:01

your grandma is gangsta

Comments

imababeee 0

Monday 13 February 2012 9:09

You go granny, you little devil.

LaColombianita 26

Monday 13 February 2012 9:09

Go grandma!

Razzle_Dazzle_5 11

Monday 13 February 2012 9:10

You know how old people are, she probably just had too many swings of apple cider.

ScarletBloom 14

Monday 13 February 2012 9:13

Drunk at 9am? That's something I should try it out during my golden age.

badass243 6

Monday 13 February 2012 9:13

America, **** yeah

tanneriscool 2

Monday 13 February 2012 10:21

Lick my butt and suck on my balls!! Team America.... Anyone know what I'm talking about?

xXRazelleLuniiXx 9

Monday 13 February 2012 23:35

No... I don't think I do...

Rddvl 11

Monday 13 February 2012 9:21

Be happy that your grandma is one of these cool seniors.

lollipop77_fml 6

Monday 13 February 2012 9:24

Way to go Granny!

Knash 3

Monday 13 February 2012 9:28

g-ma knows how to do it right.

nabila21 0

Monday 13 February 2012 10:26

F*** YEAH BADAS* GRAMMA!!!

cocodecoeur 12

Monday 13 February 2012 10:40

Nanny's gone wild!!

Keywords

Family Miscellaneous DIY Cats Poopoo peepee Work Awkward Management Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Frustration Transportation Dogs Animals ADHD Dating Love Mental health Health Anxiety Technology Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, I found out that my boyfriend lost a bunch of money by buying some scam cryto crap linked to that "Hawk tuah" girl. Easiest break-up ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 455

You deserved it 109

Today, I set up my phone to take a time-lapse video of the sunset. When I checked the footage later, all I saw was me running back and forth because I’d forgotten my keys and wallet multiple times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 142

You deserved it 417

The Top

Today, I was having an after work-out dinner with my ex-girlfriend and we were having a great time, catching up, eating good food, all the good things. Then when I got home, I realized I just talked to my ex-girlfriend for an hour and a half about how much better her new boyfriend is than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 885

You deserved it 40 091

Today, while I was working at a sushi restaurant, a guy told me he wanted the table next to the "koi fish tank", because he wanted to let the fish know what happens when they "cross him". FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 643

You deserved it 2 570

Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 021

You deserved it 3 405

Today, I was so sleep deprived that while making instant oatmeal, I poured the oats into the garbage and put the empty packet in a bowl, then microwaved it for 2 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 264

You deserved it 2 707

Today, I had to babysit a 9 year-old girl. I hadn't slept for almost 40 hours and fell half-asleep while sitting on her couch for two minutes. She asked me something, but I thought it was a dream and answered with, "Your mom's a hoe." When I woke up, I realized I'd said it out loud instead of in my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 392

You deserved it 1 350

Today, I wore a bikini to the lake with my parents. I didn't know that my back was covered in bruises, and ended up having to awkwardly explain to my parents that I am not in an abusive relationship; the bruises came from the sex I had last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 533

You deserved it 16 292

Same thing different taste

Drunk level: 2000

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