Intimacy: Today, I looked my boyfriend in the eyes and said "I love y-"...

By bugger - 22/02/2015 17:31

Today, I looked my boyfriend in the eyes and said "I love y-" He cut me off with, "Babe, a blowjob's worth a thousand words" and held eye contact until I awkwardly excused myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 072

You deserved it 5 180

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:16 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 960

You deserved it 14 588

By dummy - 17/02/2012 00:03 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 733

You deserved it 5 666

What have you done this time?

By rockefoe - 15/11/2010 20:49 - United States

Today, I realized the only times my boyfriend ever says, "I love you" are after he screws up or when he wants a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 649

You deserved it 6 724

By Anonymous - 28/11/2010 06:16 - United States

Today, while making a move in a board game that helped my boyfriend win, he got all excited and said "I love you, babe." I smiled until I realized this was the first time he told me that other than when he wants a blow-job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 868

You deserved it 6 316

By Hopeless romantic - 16/08/2014 06:20 - Australia - Perth

Today, I began to sign "I love you" to my boyfriend from across the room. I ended up just poking myself in the eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 489

You deserved it 10 323

By Sybille - 06/12/2008 12:14 - France

Today, my boyfriend was laying down on top of me and he was looking at me with passion in his eyes. I thought he was finally going to tell me that he loved me. Instead, he said, "You have a booger." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 517

You deserved it 4 064

By not impressed - 09/10/2015 18:27 - Canada - Nanaimo

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 330

You deserved it 4 607

True romantic

By Anonymous - 28/03/2020 08:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. During the act, he looked deep in to my eyes before whispering, "Up the arse next time?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 204

You deserved it 375

By omgwhyme - 08/01/2012 14:36 - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 423

You deserved it 49 348

Classy

By Anonymous - 12/01/2013 20:12 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I spontaneously poured my heart out for my boyfriend, telling him how much I love and adore him. He answered by leaning in close, saying, "Jolly good" in an affected accent, and burping loud and clear in my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 491

You deserved it 5 101

denaeb123 24

Sunday 22 February 2015 21:08

He sounds like most of his dick is in his personality

ghetto_child 19

Sunday 22 February 2015 21:08

pure romance

Comments

theotherguyss 3

Monday 23 February 2015 19:32

Really knows how to make a lady swoon; guy's a keeper *sarcasm*

theotherguyss 3

Monday 23 February 2015 19:36

Guess he thinks more with his "head" than his head =

fliz 17

Monday 23 February 2015 21:36

And they say chivalry is dead

rosebud2175 3

Monday 23 February 2015 21:57

DUMP HIM! He clearly sees you as a piece of ass for his pleasure. He doesn't deserve you or anyone else.

cappellaaa 23

Monday 23 February 2015 22:12

he sounds like a romantic, a real winner

Cilg1244 17

Tuesday 24 February 2015 0:42

It's funny how on the other FML about the girl who sold the guy's Atari and all his other games people were like "Omg she didn't know. She did it becuase she loves you" and then here all I'm seeing is people saying "You should dump him" or stuff like that.