Intimacy: Today, I was playing an intense game of Flappy Bird. I was so...

By Anonymous - 28/02/2014 22:26 - Russian Federation - Korol

Today, I was playing an intense game of Flappy Bird. I was so excited at being about to beat my high score that I got a hard-on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 465

You deserved it 22 524

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Same thing different taste

By (not) fucked - 16/05/2014 16:01 - United States - Kingsville

Today, my girlfriend decided that we won't be having any more sex until I beat her ridiculously high score on Flappy Bird. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 763

You deserved it 8 265

By bobo - 24/04/2011 01:02 - Canada

Today, I played Angry Birds for two hours. I got so into the game, I failed to remember that I was sitting on a public toilet. I only realized this when the janitor came to check on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 062

You deserved it 52 958

By Danny - 28/05/2012 18:02 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 294

You deserved it 5 774

Guitar ****

By massachusettsan - 25/06/2014 00:07 - United States - Monomoy Island

Today, I got the same feeling in my chest when I orgasmed as when I hit a hard section in Guitar Hero. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 613

You deserved it 8 926

By Anonymous - 20/06/2009 11:13 - Switzerland

Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 803

You deserved it 97 689

By Rosie - 13/06/2012 16:07 - Germany - Wesel

Today, I woke up to the sight of my boyfriend playing a game on my iPhone with his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 384

You deserved it 5 246

By BejeweledJizz - 05/11/2016 12:29

Today, after weeks of being addicted to Bejeweled Blitz, I couldn't stop thinking about it while having sex with my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 906

You deserved it 4 861

Vaporeon?

By me. - 07/05/2012 20:38 - Canada - Orillia

Today, I got an inconvenient erection while at my girlfriends house, so I tried to think of something stupid to get rid of it. I tried thinking of Pokémon, which actually made me harder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 284

You deserved it 12 182

By ThePopeMan - 17/03/2009 17:42 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she started moaning and breathing heavily. I thought she was getting hot and was about to cum. Unfortunetly, she soon said, "I'm bored, let's play a board game." She was sighing, not moaning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 160

You deserved it 23 117

By CandyCrushAddict - 21/09/2013 15:09 - United States - Wilson

Today, while having sex with my wife, my Candy Crush addiction hit me full force, and all I could do was think about possible moves I could make in the level I'm stuck on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 391

You deserved it 51 122

LifeAlertTwerk 14

Saturday 1 March 2014 5:17

It sounds like you weren't "flappy" anymore!

chelsearenaeee 16

Saturday 1 March 2014 5:16

Sounds like a pipe did get in your way ;)

Comments

boredgirl123 11

Saturday 1 March 2014 8:47

You really need to get out more. That's a little ridiculous.

alicat13 12

Saturday 1 March 2014 9:29

I see a shrink in your future!

Witchylady 17

Saturday 1 March 2014 10:11

Dumb ass!

tranced_ 45

Saturday 1 March 2014 10:18

I bet your high score must be near 16 ;)

ileenefudge 29

Saturday 1 March 2014 10:27

What is your current high score?

BoltTheSuperdog 22

Saturday 1 March 2014 10:40

Now you meet to beat something else!

Mirakledba 10

Saturday 1 March 2014 10:58

only in Russia

carterjanelle 9

Saturday 1 March 2014 11:27

Reading the phrase "hard on" created a splashy fish effect in my pants. FML

ckerane 16

Saturday 1 March 2014 11:41

haha someone flappied out haha

xsydneyx123 28

Saturday 1 March 2014 11:43

Soo. Did you beat both of them? Lmfao!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I got home from a business trip and found my wife in bed with my sister. She tried to claim they had just had a girls' night and fell asleep watching a movie, even though when I caught them, they were naked, wet and my wife’s head was buried in my sister's crotch. Movie night, sure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 786

You deserved it 148

Today, I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I can only have sex with really fat men, because that’s what turns me on, yet as soon as the sex is over, through no fault of theirs, I have to run to the toilet to be sick because I can’t believe what I just had sex with. I’m so messed up in the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 905

You deserved it 2 524

The Top

Today, one of my friends confessed his love for me and said he wanted to be more than friends. Jaded by guys who only wanted one thing, I pushed him away saying, “Oh really, is that what you think you need to say to get in my pants?” He frowned and stormed off. Later, I found out he really did want a relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76

You deserved it 962

Today, after seven months studying in Italy, I understood that the "Finocchio" nickname that my Italian friends gave to me really means "Queer". FML

I agree, your life sucks 552

You deserved it 85

Today, I had a food allergy test done because of an ugly acne upswing, and after over a year of vegetarianism, I find out that I'm allergic to soy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 186

You deserved it 22 417

Today, I was helping a women that was looking for skin care products. She kept commenting on the look and "texture" of my skin in a very creepy and almost hungry fashion. I'm afraid that she wants to skin me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 588

You deserved it 490

Today, I told my mom I loved her a lot. Her reply? "Thanks." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 501

You deserved it 4 232

Today, I was at a party and went to the bathroom. The door was tricky to lock, but in my inebriated state I thought I'd managed it. Apparently, I hadn’t. Midway through my business, the door swung open, and in walked a group of people looking for their coats. We just stared at each other in shock until someone finally closed the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 336

You deserved it 143

Same thing different taste

Guitar ****

Vaporeon?

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