Love: Today, I was propositioned by an incredibly pretty girl. I'm...

By Junktown - 07/07/2011 14:40 - Israel

Today, I was propositioned by an incredibly pretty girl. I'm a 24 year old virgin; she's my best mate's girlfriend. She tells him everything when drunk, and he's a black-belt in karate. This could officially be classified as torture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 673

You deserved it 6 342

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Same thing different taste

By Brennan Lebrun - 18/05/2018 05:00

Today, I went to my best friend's house to propose to my girlfriend of 6 years. When I walked in, she was having sex with my best friend's 37-year-old brother. She then yelled, ”You should have knocked first!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 924

You deserved it 369

Awkward conversation

By anon - 28/12/2019 05:00 - United States - La Puente

Today, I had to have a very difficult and awkward conversation with my best friend about her fiancé hitting on me. She seemed completely unfazed and ended up admitting that a three-way with me was actually her idea, but she didn't want to "weird me out" by asking me about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 623

You deserved it 378

Catch 22

By Anonymous - 26/03/2021 20:01

Today, I was at a friend's house; she left the room for a few minutes. Her dad then put me in a headlock and told me that I'd, "better treat his daughter right if I ever wanted to walk again," because she's in love with me. I'm a gay guy, and she knows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 071

You deserved it 104

Read the room

By Anonymous - 28/02/2024 05:00 - United States - Maryland Heights

Today, I proposed to the girl of my dreams. She asked me who I was, and maced me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90

You deserved it 1 228

By whattheactualfuck - 22/01/2016 12:50 - South Africa - Durban

Today, my new girlfriend's father made good on his "What you do to her I do to you" threat when he took me out for drinks and then drunkenly hit on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 848

You deserved it 3 408

By Anonymous - 27/09/2009 02:18 - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with the cliché of the diamond ring in a champagne glass. Apparently there was an off-duty police officer across the room watching me slip the ring into the glass. He thought I was slipping in a date-rape drug and tackled me down before I could propose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 163

You deserved it 4 423

Conundrum

By Anonymous - 04/05/2021 04:01

Today, my best friend is completely head-over-heels for his girlfriend, has been buying her very expensive stuff and gave her the ring of compromise after 4 years of relationship. The problem is, I just found out that the girlfriend has been sexting with someone else, and is sure to dump my friend for that guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 017

You deserved it 141

By ohwell - 24/11/2014 13:44 - Sweden - Tullinge

Today, I met my best friend's girlfriend for the first time. After a few hours of talking and eating, she followed me to the bathroom and said, dead serious, ''If you ever touch him or get too close to him, I will cut you''. I've known him for twelve years, they have been dating for a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 938

You deserved it 3 305

By Anonymous - 09/12/2012 14:53 - United States - Conroe

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years drunkenly introduced me to another very special lady. His wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 352

You deserved it 3 771

All kinds of wrong

By Anonymous - 16/06/2020 14:01

Today, while at my friend's house, she had to leave the room for a few minutes. Her dad then put me in a headlock and told me that I had "better treat his daughter right if I ever wanted to walk again," because she's in love with me. Then he left. I'm a gay guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 796

You deserved it 200

InsidiousChild 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 18:46

hit it

cowjudgesyou 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 18:49

Being a black belt means nothing anymore: schools give out belts to anyone willing to put in the money. go for it

Comments

slushpup9696 12

Thursday 7 July 2011 23:08

If I were your friend with the girlfriend and you explained the situation to me, I'd tell my girlfriend she could have sex with you because it's not like it would mean anything. I think I'd just be bro and let my girlfriend take your virginity.

nfc14 2

Thursday 7 July 2011 23:11

Hes a 24 yr old virgin this needs to happen. 1 Tell mr black belt what happened but swear him to secrecy. 2 When he dumps her be around for the shoulder to cry on. 3 Have a spare pillow

DriftingTaco 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 23:26

that... is comedy

NYCM 6

Thursday 7 July 2011 23:48

Bros over hoes

djxerxes9000 18

Friday 8 July 2011 0:10

Bro code says no!

luciferdrive 0

Friday 8 July 2011 0:19

What if... Since you're a virgin you won't be good your first time. She'll laugh at you for it and tell her boyfriend.

deadlydk 0

Friday 8 July 2011 0:27

he is from Israel were black belts are earned. his friend with mire training could become a Israel commando one of the top anti-terrorism forces in the world BTW

spanishfool 0

Friday 8 July 2011 0:28

no wonder ur a virgin. your a pussy.

horrorfreak79nj 2

Friday 8 July 2011 0:44

Sweet lord ... don't make the mistake of taking her up on that proposition. There's a good reason your a virgin at 24, and it's most likely your a loser. The idea of a pretty, hot girl being seriously & legitimately into you simply isin't fathomable. Your probably being set-up. Hopefully you haven't done something stupid & embarrassed yourself further. (your welcome.)