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By nk - 03/11/2010 04:39 - United States

Today, I was so lonely that I had a 3 hour conversation with a one-legged cricket I found in my room. I'm keeping him. He has a name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 557

You deserved it 12 052

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Ear Invasion - 26/01/2013 05:53 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, I made a new friend: the cricket the doctor pulled out of my ear canal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 378

You deserved it 3 457

Lonely, so lonely…

By JustAnotherFML23 - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Seattle

Today, my loneliness reached a new level when I befriended the fly in my apartment, Mr. Stickyfoot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 772

You deserved it 7 236

I believe it was I who said…

By unfortunate - 25/04/2012 04:50 - Sweden

Today, I was so lonely that I had a conversation with myself on my way home. It was only when I reached my apartment complex that I discovered that my neighbour had been walking behind me, laughing to himself the whole way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 116

You deserved it 10 484

Cool

By daisythebunny1988 - 21/03/2020 00:01

Today, I was sitting in my garage with a fan on my face because it was hot when a suicidal cricket decided to jump into the blades, causing his cricket guts to be sprayed onto my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 844

You deserved it 225

By Anonymous - 19/02/2011 06:17 - United States

Today, I was so lonely, I wound up talking for two hours to the creep who calls my number every Friday night and makes creepy obscene breathing noises on the other end of the phone. Turns out he's a better listener than my husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 761

You deserved it 5 902

Talk to me

By JoseIsAdork - 11/01/2016 18:03 - United States - Somers

Today, I realized how lonely I am, when I got a call from an elderly women who had dialed the wrong number. We ended up having a 20 minute conversation about her cat and how he "just won't use the darn litter pan." I was sad when she had to hang up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 345

You deserved it 2 385

By Username - 29/07/2011 19:17 - United States

Today, I realized that since I started working full time, the only friend I have left is my cat. Lonely and bored out of my mind, I told him about my day. He decided to end the conversation by shitting on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 961

You deserved it 6 325

If the shoe fits…

By Bruce - 17/08/2010 17:09 - United States

Today, I discovered a bat in my new apartment. I found him in my shoe… with my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 713

You deserved it 3 655

By LonelyAF - 12/08/2017 13:00

Today, I was so lonely I called my stalker ex-boyfriend. He was too busy to talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 412

You deserved it 4 358

By Anonymous - 23/08/2009 04:38 - United States

Today, while laying in bed trying to go to sleep, I listened to the chirping crickets and appreciated how soothing the sounds were. Then I realized I lived on the 8th floor of an apartment building. Turns out my brother's science project got into my room and multiplied... a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 494

You deserved it 2 278

Next

Top comments

SmallTownCutie 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 12:06

aww it's ok. you're just lonely.

Illyssa_fml 4

Wednesday 3 November 2010 12:12

awesome!! are you gonna find a giant peach now? haha

Comments

TheNewGuy03 28

Wednesday 3 November 2010 14:46

that...is a determined cricket. and i'd have to guess that you're...lonely? my conversation with the cricket would have gone something like this: me: ugh...what a day. *sigh* cricket: *cricket* me: WHAT THE ****!?!??! *smash* |the kid|

bachooka 5

Wednesday 3 November 2010 15:59

I just woke up my kids by laughing at this. lol.

RedPillSucks 31

Thursday 4 November 2010 0:45

Yeah. Sometimes I wish I could 'favorite' a single comment, but alas....

randiZ25 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 15:21

well you have a friend for about a year... enjoy!

dacho 7

Wednesday 3 November 2010 15:25

Because of you not saying "I named him [name]", this is either fake, oryou named him Edward/Jacob.

biskitbukit 7

Wednesday 3 November 2010 15:26

Get out.

Mubus 0

Thursday 4 November 2010 8:57

That's what she said!

KennKenn 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 15:28

sounds more like a MLIA

heartless_j 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 15:29

well your cricket can be friends with my tree frog so that way you can meet other peopl and he can meet other animals

SquaresviL7e 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 15:54

Frogs do love insects.

swimmerstud 7

Wednesday 3 November 2010 15:30

I'm jealous now.

iheartglasses 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 15:34

What do you feed a cricket?

SmellMyCheese 1

Wednesday 3 November 2010 18:33

he doesn't. it's forced to eat itself. god knows what's left of it now.

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Wednesday 3 November 2010 19:18

Awkward silence. OP's starving it.

fatman1970 25

Wednesday 3 November 2010 15:38

Err... Have you been missing any medication?

restythestar 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 15:40

A pic or this one's not real

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Today, I didn't mind paying a little bit extra for my manicure because I forgot how nice it was to have someone hold your hand. Even if it was an old Asian lady. FML

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Today, I was having lunch with my sister and my mother. While my mom was busy ordering food, my sister said to me, "Look at this!" then contorted her face so that she had a double chin. My mother looked over and said to her, "Stop making fun of your sister!" FML

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