Intimacy: Today, I was undressing for my girlfriend. I thought I was being...

By Anonymous - 25/08/2015 07:32 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was undressing for my girlfriend. I thought I was being all smooth and sexy, until I went to sit on the side of the bed and beckon her over. Instead, I sat heavily on my balls, screamed, then fell off the bed sobbing like a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 360

You deserved it 7 146

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Same thing different taste

Mood ruined

By InterestingReaction - 10/04/2022 04:00

Today, it was mine and my girlfriend's two-year anniversary. Back in my room, I decided to get sexy for her by opening the bathroom door, dropping my bath towel, and slowly approaching the bed in the buff. I tripped over my feet and fell flat on my face twice while doing so, which she hysterically laughed at. FML

I agree, your life sucks 942

You deserved it 527

By Anonymous - 20/06/2009 11:13 - Switzerland

Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 803

You deserved it 97 689

Cool moves, bro

By Anonymous - 30/06/2012 09:45

Today, in an attempt to be sexy, my boyfriend picked me up and threw me down onto the bed. I fell straight through it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 367

You deserved it 5 692

You tried

By Loveless - 10/09/2009 06:18 - United States

Today, during foreplay, I was trying to be sexy. But instead I fell off the bed, landed in the laundry basket, and was attacked by the dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 159

You deserved it 5 701

Not really the desired effect

By Ouchithurt - 04/08/2009 07:55 - United States

Today, I was following my girlfriend up the stairs, I was pretty sure I was going to get lucky. As I was almost up the set of stairs, she lifted her skirt and revealed to me that she wasn't wearing any panties. I fell backwards down the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 019

You deserved it 21 065

By Gordon - 22/07/2009 14:12 - United States

Today, I was standing by the bed naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opens the door and walks over to me, swinging her hips, wearing pratically nothing. About four feet from me, she trips on the edge of the floor mat, and uses my 'junk' to catch herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 702

You deserved it 6 765

By joe rogan fucking sucks, dude - 27/04/2014 20:51 - Australia - Warwick

Today, my girlfriend informed me that during the night, I shot up in bed and whimpered tearfully, "I don't have anything for the fancy-dress!" She also decided to share this with all our friends. I'm never going to live this down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 140

You deserved it 5 095

By shit.... - 08/11/2012 18:25 - Malaysia - Kuala Selangor

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 636

You deserved it 31 360

By Geez - 19/10/2009 17:02 - Netherlands

Today, I finally got intimate with my girlfriend, the girl of my dreams. I undressed and, ready to step in bed with her, I see her staring at 'it'. Which was quickly followed by laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 206

You deserved it 3 765

Deez nutz hurtz

By Anonymous - 11/03/2020 15:01

Today, I was about to have sex with my wife, so I walked into our room naked, but then whacked myself in the nuts with the door handle as I attempted to close it. She can't stop laughing, and I can't sit down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 084

You deserved it 523

myoukei 31

Tuesday 25 August 2015 21:56

Her: "I'll make you scream baby .... That was not what i intended"

Jowisee 29

Tuesday 25 August 2015 21:53

Well that'll get her in the mood.

Comments

Kittyphysics 21

Wednesday 26 August 2015 19:57

awww op. at least you tried. a for effort.

reyse_labrecque 4

Wednesday 26 August 2015 21:46

#GrrrrrMondays

theroxors19 12

Thursday 27 August 2015 6:54

well I'd ****** cry too if I sat on my balls. FYL

lilchica22001 22

Thursday 27 August 2015 7:18

Thank you for making me laugh out loud uncontrollably in Walgreens! At least the pharmacist laughed with me....or at me? Crappppp!

pizza_lover_23 6

Thursday 27 August 2015 21:02

That's what happens when it's too long ??

Strega 5

Sunday 30 August 2015 2:19

I'm a girl and I've never sobbed due to sitting on my own balls. So no, you sobbed like a boy :P

AwkwardKarma 18

Monday 31 August 2015 0:43

yukahnn 10

Wednesday 2 September 2015 21:14

Bwaha lmao bro im so sorry for you.

nishantvas 13

Saturday 24 October 2015 19:58

Sorry for laughing so hard man

juniorbirdman 7

Tuesday 16 August 2016 3:44

I know the feeling, I've done something very similar, but my girlfriend decided shed comfort me by giving me a ******* and hitting my balls by accident, only making it worse