Miscellaneous: Today, my family went to Seaworld. When we got there, my dad...

By Username - 19/05/2011 22:46 - United States

Today, my family went to Seaworld. When we got there, my dad sarcastically told me not to get lost, because I might get mistaken for Shamu. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 194

You deserved it 7 952

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Wasted

By Anonymous - 05/08/2013 15:33 - United States

Today, my parents held a big family dinner at our house. Being the only underage person there, I had to sit there while everyone got progressively drunker and started commenting on how eerily similar I look to Shamu the whale. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 952

You deserved it 4 765

By Shamu - 27/02/2011 19:28 - United States

Today, I found out my friends call me 'Shamu the whale' behind my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 011

You deserved it 7 088

By Betchsadface - 13/07/2010 04:34 - United States

Today, I got bitch-slapped by a walrus at Sea Life Park. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 774

You deserved it 10 795

By furball - 15/06/2014 20:01 - Inchture

Today, I was at Sea World and was about to take a picture of the big walrus. I noticed my phone was still set to use the front camera, and I muttered "Oops, selfie mode." A guy next to me turned, looked at me, and said "Not like there's a difference for you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 265

You deserved it 9 318

By Anonymous - 17/04/2009 11:49 - Malaysia

Today, my family and I went to a beach where you could swim with dolphins. I was a little scared to swim with them so the trainers had a 5 minute chat to me about how they were harmless creatures. Once I got in, the dolphin attacked me and bit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 807

You deserved it 7 555

By Anonymous - 24/11/2012 13:59 - United States

Today, I was playing with my four year-old cousin. He had a toy whale and said, "Shark!" I corrected him and told him it was a whale. He picked it up, threw it at my face, and yelled, "SHAAARK!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 470

You deserved it 7 855

By Someone - 16/04/2014 00:20 - Canada - Windsor

Today, our family went to a water park. The park's mascot came up to greet us, and my daughter got scared. She then refused to go inside, so we had no choice but to leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 051

You deserved it 5 824

By Anonymous - 17/01/2014 23:52 - United Kingdom

Today, I overheard my mum tell my sister that she should make me a bridesmaid at her wedding. My sister scoffed, "She looks like Shamu, mum. I can't have THAT in my wedding pics." followed by laughter and my mum saying, "Touché." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 042

You deserved it 6 792

Good boy

By Johndoe - 30/10/2021 20:00

Today, my dad called my by the family dog's name, and stared at me blankly as if struggling to remember my name when I was annoyed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 983

You deserved it 158

By StungAlot - 12/06/2019 06:18

Today, I got stung by jellyfish. As I writhed in pain on the beach, my dad comes up and asks me to be quiet, that I'm embarrassing him. He also mentioned that jellyfish were out today and that I should be careful. Thanks, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 841

You deserved it 223

KatrinaKitten 16

Friday 20 May 2011 1:20

You should have yanked him in the water and drowned him; Show him Shamu!

ZombieeeeUnicorn 1

Friday 20 May 2011 1:19

I like cupcakes.

Comments

bigdaddy18 0

Friday 20 May 2011 3:38

tell your dad where to shove it

birdfreak 24

Friday 20 May 2011 3:49

at least he was being sarcastic?

caviar_fml 2

Friday 20 May 2011 3:58

LOL

perdix 29

Friday 20 May 2011 3:59

I put on a joke that took a whole different angle on the Shamu comparison, but I guess it was too politically incorrect, so it got removed. Your loss, it was pretty funny, (and not at all disparaging.) Oh, well.

itsxbabyxjay 0

Friday 20 May 2011 4:13

Cool Story, Bro.

itsxbabyxjay 0

Friday 20 May 2011 4:14

Cool Story, Bro.

Chris9154 6

Friday 20 May 2011 4:19

ur dads kinda of an a*% h^#£

Jenna_Tell_Yuh 0

Friday 20 May 2011 5:58

I think you were going for ASSHOLE. you're welcome

lmaoatall 6

Friday 20 May 2011 4:19

your dads a bully. but don't worry, he was probably bullied when he was a kid. just learn from his mistake and don't do it to your kids. my parents did shit to me that was uncool for a parent and I vowed that I wouldn't do the same to mine. and I haven't.

Holybatman 16

Friday 20 May 2011 8:49

I think you took this FML a little too seriously. I was bullied a lot in elementary school, so I know it can hurt, but in this case it was a joke. My dad makes sarcastic jokes quite a bit, and it's obvious he's not being mean, he's just teasing. It's funny that I read an older FML this morning in which a friend of the OP jokingly hugs him while he's in line buying condoms, making it look like he's gay. That was an embarrassing moment, yet all the comments praised the friend for the joke, whereas most of the comments here say that the father is an asshole. I thought the joke was funny, and should be taken for what it is, rather than mistaken as proof of child abuse.