This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By T3STI - 07/05/2013 01:44 - United States - Grand Prairie

Spicy
Today, my girlfriend gave birth to our first child. Our nurse was the lady I had a one night stand with 3 nights ago, and yes she remembered me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 16 914
You deserved it 194 496

Top comments

Yeah... You deserve that. I hope she told your girlfriend.

U totally deserved that u unfaithful excuse for a man.

Comments

Yeah... You deserve that. I hope she told your girlfriend.

Sounds more like your the child to me, Asshole.

Would it make me an asshole to correct 11's grammar? Yes? Good. *you're

Actually no it wouldnt, thank you kind sir. Honestly im a bit confused on how i missed that myself.

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FurLbro 1

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*checks pants* IT IS TRUE. IT IS A MA'AM.

Well considering that you have a private profile and no picture (at least i can't see one on my iphone) i profiled you based on the first gender that came to mind. My apologies.

FurLbro 1

Oh my bad I read that as "3 years ago". YDI

That was directed at number Twenty-four, just trying to avoid confusion.

Lol yeah, s'all good. :3 I just thought my username was sorta girly.

Well when i looked at your username i thought of two things, either you were a girl, or you were a conceded emo boy, i went for the more fun option. :P No offense intended btw. :)

JasonEP 3

You do know it takes 9 months before a baby is born....and the one night stand was 3 days prior to that right?

Conceded emo boy... That does sound fun. It's actually referencing a song. I feel bad for having such an off topic conversation here...

66, If you're referring to 28's comment, you should probably have read their other comment where they stated they misread it as 'three years' instead of 'three days'.

28 - It says my Girlfriend. Not my Ex Girlfriend or the mother of my soon to be child. My girlfriend, meaning, present tense.

FMLshark 12

People like you, OP, have no business in procreating. Please remove your balls from your body, if you have any to begin with, and promptly toss them in a fireplace. Or have your girlfriend do that for you. I'm sure she'd love to at this point.

28 - he said he'd had the one night stand 3 nights prior to his girlfriend giving birth to their baby, which suggests that they've been together at least 9 months. By my math, that's pretty solid cheating.

Clearly you people still replying to 28 read only that comment, instead of reading on and finding that they corrected themselves and had read the FML wrong (#35).

How is she his girlfriend if they're not dating?

omfg_creepers 8

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omfg_creepers 8

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#58 being illiterate would have nothing to do with it, your comments just stupid.

Epicwaffles, how did you confuse the "you're/your" again? (For those not understanding, please refer to comments #10 & #20.)

87, your/you're isn't the grammatical error in that comment. It's not ''you are comment." it's "your comment." The actual error is comment's*.

87 just got corrected after a failed correcting attempt. WOOT WOOT!!! Grammar nazi's 0. Not grammar nazi's 1.

65- how the **** is that worse? His gf just gave birth to this cheating asshole's spawn. She now has a lifelong responsibility that she has to share with a man who she can't trust. Or she can dump his ass and choose to be a single mom, which is also not easy. You're an idiot.

So I get thumbed down because I point out the irony in 69's post about literacy? 58 said irrelevant, NOT illiteracy.

U totally deserved that u unfaithful excuse for a man.

I agree so much with this comment that I'm going to refrain from correcting your spelling of the word "you." Because quite honestly I would respect a man wHo TyPeD lYk tHiS than a man who cheats on his pregnant wife.

*girlfriend *significant other *insert title here

minamail25 7

Totally was thinking that!!!

midgetMANjay 7

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midgetMANjay 7

i read the fml as three years ago, sorry lol

100 - unless it's been Jan 1st the past 3 days, no...

I agree with you and I have a very irrelevant question...why so you have your number on FML? Not such a great idea. Just saying...

hotPinklipstick 24

100- 3 NIGHTS ago, idk where you are getting years from. EDIT: when I posted my comment my phone hadn't loaded the comment correcting himself

I hardly type lyk tis bt I was in a lecture and i coudnt resist making this "thing" feel more guilty...

iloveryan052710 8
iloveryan052710 8

I knew someone was gonna catch that.

^ And yet you didn't bother to correct yourself?

^ you can edit your comment after posting. And seriously, I don't understand how people keep making this mistake. The difference between your and you're is really not that difficult to understand.

It's not that serious 170 it's not grammar school

Maybe you shouldn't go around cheating on your girlfriend and stuff like that won't happen

mashimarox 12
bizarre_ftw 21

A little batard is playing pranks on your heavily pregnant wife, a pathetic ******* worthless shit of a (for lack of a better term) man is one that cheats on his heavily pregnant wife with her attending nurse That poor child and mum, they deserve something better

ObsessedWithGays 7

You cheated on your girlfriend, while she was pregnant? You deserve it.

curlyfry33 8

Didn't really think about that did you op? Your just lucky you didn't get the other girl pregers also you lil man hoe.

Matty1188 6

60 - It's only been three days, so he could have.

for all we know, in a month we'll be reading, "today, the nurse that attended my child's birth a month ago, whom I had a one night stand with three nights prior to that night, called and said that I should prepare for another infant. FML."

Pegasister_fml 5

Did your girlfriend find out?

I sure as hell hope so, so that she can get rid of his putrid ass.

nublets 12

Time to own up champ, because there could be a call for you down at the hospital 9 months from now. God knows how weird that would be for everyone