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By guess28 - 14/07/2009 18:19 - Puerto Rico

Spicy
Today, my girlfriend of over a year said she has been faking her orgasms since the first time we've had sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks 50 775
You deserved it 20 838
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Top comments

ddrluna 2

I don't understand why people even do that. Why not just be honest and try to work on it? Sorry about your luck.

47 4
jailbot 7

D: I feel your pain. It takes an impossible amount of work for me to have one, and even then, it's only been twice. I just wish my boyfriend didn't make me feel like something is wrong with me.

17 1

Comments

lexiBRo 0

Why do girls do that?!?! It is counterproductive to fake an ******. You are setting yourself up to be faking orgasms for a long time, an entire YEAR in the OPs gf's case. FYL If your g/f is old enough to have sex, she should be old enough to talk to you.

3 0
The_Truth84 0

If she fakes the ******, who's she hurting? You're still getting off, so you're satisfied, and she's making you think that she's satisfied too so you have no reason to do anything different. F *H* L, not FYL

2 2
girlygirl666 0

Hahaha Plexico

0 0
plexico 3

Get some control, you incompetent asshole! You probably come 45 seconds after you put it in her. Slow down or even stop when you think you are getting close to coming. In a couple of moments, the feeling will ease and then start pumping away again. If you can do it for 4 or 5 hours like me, then you should be able to make her have a real ******. Actually, most people think the optimal time span for sex is 7-13 minutes. If you do manage to gain some control and your girl still can't come, you might need to hire a closer.

1 6
jd0g07 0

suckaaaaa!! **** it as long as you get yours!! haha

1 7
markssh 0

4 to 5 hours is nuts. 10-30 minutes is great for me. This one girl said it was starting to hurt after 20 minutes (ex gf, but we still ****), so I hurried to finish.

0 0
plexico 3

If the four hours is: 2 minutes of *******. 10 minutes of her making me a sandwich and me eating it. 3 hours and 45 minutes of watching football on TV 2 more minutes of *******. I'm up 2 orgasms to zero, plus I saw a game! I was just kidding about the 4-5 hours just to psych the poor bastard OP out. It sounds like his girlfriend's LEAST favorite movie is that one about car theft: Done in 30 Seconds!

1 1
waterynuggets 0

I hope you were kidding if it takes you 10 mins to make a sandwich WTF! lol. There are lots of things people can do to build up to that moment but yes, I can fix me a motherfucking Dagwood sandwich in less than 10 mins and I love football, what an excellent day that sounds like

0 0
kitkatkelly 0

It's Gone in 60 Seconds, and you're not as clever as you think you are.

0 0
plexico 3

I am too as clever as I think I am. I knew it was "Gone" instead of "Done" and 60 seconds instead of 30, but lots of women are thrilled to get 60 WHOLE SECONDS of throbbing dick, right? And waterynugggets, the 10 minutes included EATING the sandwich, too. Also, you can't expect her to make the sandwich at full speed. She's quite delirious after the wild two minutes, plus she has to wipe up the wet spot (and wash her hands -- I know what real mayo tastes like, so don't try that on me.)

0 0
dacho 7

Try not to look at it as a bad thing, at least she loves you/has enough respect for you to admit you that. Now try working on it!

1 1
Ridyn 0

must suck to have a small dick. you fail.

0 0
jd0g07 0

I would have been like suckaaaaa!! haha as long as you get yours right!?!? haha

1 6
robodoll 0

At least she told you. I think most women who fake probably don't tell their partner or we'd see more FMLs like this.

1 1
o_O_0_o 0

jajajaja apues bien. pobresito. mucha gente hace eso, no te preocupe.

0 0