Love: Today, my suburban, white boyfriend of two years told me he wanted...

By hatboxghost - 09/07/2009 05:17 - United States

Today, my suburban, white boyfriend of two years told me he wanted to tell me something serious. He sat me down, looked me in the eye and said "I want to be gangster." I started laughing thinking he was joking. He was 100% serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 947

You deserved it 7 733

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Girl - 17/03/2010 07:05 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of more than two years told me in front of all of our friends that he'd trade me for some Playstation 3 games. I laughed it off because I thought he was kidding. He made it clear that he was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 679

You deserved it 5 133

Change of heart

By Anonymous - 28/09/2024 10:00 - United States - Lafayette

Today, my boyfriend "proposed" to me. When we first started dating, he told me that he hated the concept of marriage and absolutely never wanted to go through with it. So I laughed and turned him down, obviously thinking it was just a joke. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 227

By toughbf - 27/09/2011 08:28 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend asked me to beat him up so he could look tough around his friends. When I just stared at him, he added, "Please don't break anything though. Nothing too serious." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 834

You deserved it 3 800

By rockefoe - 20/10/2010 18:41 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I didn't feel like he loved me. His response? "Why else would I be with you? Your looks?" He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 521

You deserved it 8 693

By Anonymous - 15/05/2009 15:18 - United States

Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that I could never marry him because he's a Yankees fan. He told me he could never marry me because he couldn't see himself having a terrible love life for the rest of his life. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 698

You deserved it 13 994

By TaffyMichele - 13/09/2012 23:38 - United States - La Verne

Today, my boyfriend told me to text him when I got home to let him know I'd made it home safe. He said if I didn't, he'd assume that aliens had abducted me and that he'd get a new girlfriend. He was completely serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 049

You deserved it 3 797

By drugdealersgf - 02/12/2016 06:55

Today, my boyfriend told me, with complete confidence, that he's selected "drug dealer" as his career of choice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 128

You deserved it 1 121

By Trainwreck - 13/12/2009 17:56 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a serious talk. He told me that I was a quick-tempered emotional train wreck. He then said, "You know how we talked about getting married? Now the only way I'd marry you was if hell froze over." He smiled, gave me a kiss, and went to bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 007

You deserved it 6 733

By FUCK, NO. - 26/05/2019 06:11

Today, my pasty white boyfriend told me he intended to try and grow dreadlocks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 864

You deserved it 318

Sussy baka

By Anonymous - 29/06/2021 20:00

Today, when my boyfriend got home, I told him about how I’d had the worst day with our baby. Without blinking, he told me to say the word and he’d drive to a different city and anonymously surrender our son to a fire station and all our suffering would be over. He was completely serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 241

You deserved it 436

SimpleSimon 0

Thursday 9 July 2009 12:53

"I wanna roll with, The gangstas, But oh, no, they all think I'm too white and nerdy"

infinityrhyme 0

Thursday 9 July 2009 12:42

Maybe he's thinking you'll support him and buy some bling too.

Comments

aback 4

Thursday 9 July 2009 14:49

Aw...how sweet. He wants to be a wannabe.

curlyfriez 0

Friday 10 July 2009 5:47

ha ha! you took the words out of my mouth!

zoombabwee 0

Thursday 9 July 2009 15:12

Uhhhh..... Wow lol

Lau_fml 0

Thursday 9 July 2009 15:19

Is he 15 and watches too much tv, too?

Essentials 0

Thursday 9 July 2009 15:23

Time to move on to someone a bit more mature. He's going to be referring to you as "his bitch" soon and will have "ho's" in his "posse".

irishdubr 0

Thursday 9 July 2009 15:24

Drop him off in QB and make him find his way home

arms_akimbo 0

Thursday 9 July 2009 15:25

Dump him. Do it.

Jazzywrites007 2

Thursday 9 July 2009 15:31

I'm officially following this FML's comments because this is all gonna get very racist verrrrrrry soon =))))

jkemp84 0

Thursday 9 July 2009 15:41

LMAO....Malibu's Most Wanted bitches!!!

Peroxide 3

Thursday 9 July 2009 15:47

That's awesome, get ur friend to pull a gun on him and watch him screem like a girl and wet his pants, GANGSTA!

augustdanielle 0

Thursday 9 July 2009 15:47

LMFAO!!! :D js

Keywords

Awkward Lonely Love Party Cars ADHD Transportation Ironic Vacation Work Mental health Accident Miscellaneous Grandparents Annoying Covid Health Kids Shopping Cute Coworkers Dogs Animals Photography Art Videos Exhausted Sex Intimacy Money

The Top

Today, while eating dinner, my child picked up a piece of their chicken off the floor and put it in their mouth. It wasn’t until during bath time did I realize it wasn't chicken but poop that fell out of their diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 173

You deserved it 363

Today, my friend got a text showing his girlfriend cheating on him. Sounds like his FML, but he was at my house. He then worked his way through a bottle of my whisky and went into a drunken rage. He threw my furniture through windows, punched holes in the wall, and smashed stuff until I had to call the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 699

You deserved it 113

The Top

Today, I finally decided to get back at my roommates for eating all my food. First thing that kept disappearing was my water, so I decided to add lots of laxatives to my water this way the first person to go to the bathroom nonstop was the culprit. I forgot I had done that when I drank some myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 656

You deserved it 45 708

Today, after I've been cleaning a hostel 7/7 for free accommodation for a few weeks, and the owner telling me 3 times to take a day off while he was able to do the job, I'm finally leaving. He's now (and only now) asking me to pay for the 3 nights I "didn't work for." FML

I agree, your life sucks 946

You deserved it 101

Today, I'm anxious traveler who's flying by myself. My first flight got delayed due to one issue after another. This caused me to miss my connection. There are no more flights today so I'm having to stay overnight which, by the way, the airline won't pay for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 465

You deserved it 55

Today, my close friend who’s always been incredibly vocal about how much she hates children, never wants to be around them or have anything to do with them, stopped speaking to me. She’s incredibly "hurt" that I asked another friend to be my unborn child's godmother instead of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 199

You deserved it 182

Today, at a work gathering, I started chatting with a guy who looked familiar. It took 5 minutes to realize he was a guy from my apartment complex. For the last year I've been pretending to be an accountant named Claire whenever we met in the elevator because I thought it was funny. My real name isn’t Claire and I’m definitely not an accountant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57

You deserved it 717

Today, when I was trying to break up with my boyfriend, I told him how I needed space and time to think. His response was, "Ok, we're out of condoms anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 094

You deserved it 9 543

Same thing different taste

Change of heart

Sussy baka

Top comments

Comments