Miscellaneous: Today, while enjoying a nice dinner out, I observed a homeless...

By BerkeleyBiker - 19/04/2011 08:23 - United States

Today, while enjoying a nice dinner out, I observed a homeless man giggling hysterically to himself while wiping boogers on my bike seat and handlebars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 365

You deserved it 3 735

St. Patrick's Day: Shamrocks and Tribulations
Green anecdotes of jealousy, full of shamrocks and pints, for a memorable St. Patrick's Day! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By dadadoo - 06/02/2012 04:09 - United States

Today, while on the bus, I watched a homeless man pop a pimple on his arm and eat it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 866

You deserved it 3 331

By meesmees - 23/11/2013 10:48 - United States - Severna Park

Today, I ended up talking to a homeless man and bought him a meal. In return, he hugged me and groped my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 819

You deserved it 6 815

By no no no no no no no no no no no fuck no - 01/09/2013 20:04 - Greece - Athens

Today, I witnessed my husband hocking a loogie into his hand, then throwing it into the trash can and continuing to make our sandwiches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 304

You deserved it 3 228

By ugh - 14/06/2011 17:56 - United States

Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 701

You deserved it 3 928

Basic communication

By Tim - 16/06/2009 06:15 - United States

Today, I was enjoying some much needed serenity while I ate lunch in an empty park. To my surprise, an older, clean cut man in a suit sits on the bench next to me. Without saying a word, he unleashes the most foul of farts I've ever witnessed, gets up, gives me a nod, and leaves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 025

You deserved it 6 023

PTSD

By I have Flashbacks Now - 10/11/2016 21:15 - United States - Woonsocket

Today, while going to the mall, I witnessed the horror of someone sneezing and shitting themselves at the same time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 413

You deserved it 911

By Anonymous - 29/12/2010 07:03 - United States

Today, on the train, I was bitten by a homeless man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 728

You deserved it 4 350

By Anonymous - 22/05/2009 08:36 - United States

Today, a homeless man bathed himself in the restroom at my coffee shop in West LA. He locked himself in there for a good twenty minutes. The lingering smell was so strong that my other coworker vomited. Thanks to what is apparently a relatively strong gag reflex, I got to clean up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 099

You deserved it 2 882

Stay classy

By militarywife2b - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - France

Today, at work, I watched a man throw up in his hands, dump the contents on his plate, then eat the things it "didn't touch." I had to wash his plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 164

You deserved it 2 232

By not a shitty situation so fuck you - 24/06/2016 22:52 - United States - San Francisco

Today, in a public toilet, I got to experience a guy high out of his mind kicking in my locked stall door and puking all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 855

You deserved it 775

I_See_Purple_Ppl 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 11:54

wow, I would have giggled to myself has I made up some story to the cops and had him hauled away.

CateXOX 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 11:55

It adds extra grip- he's doing you a favor.

Comments

mahopac56 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 15:30

Dude r u fricken ratarted?!?!

looknohands 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 15:45

that was me, sorry 

Brancha 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 15:48

Who the fuq rides a bike to a dinner date

johnnybagodonuts 2

Tuesday 19 April 2011 15:55

you should've gone outside to eat your dinner right in front of him. then offer him the last piece, eat it yourself and get the hell outta there cause he's probably gonna chase you

darkmis1 17

Tuesday 19 April 2011 16:03

Maybe if you spent your money on a car and ate in more often, you wouldn't have a booger bike.

jenaandtyler4eva 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 16:08

tell him that here's a doller and go make that mcdonalds meal last and at least I got a home and food cause what he did is not right

lmaoatall 6

Tuesday 19 April 2011 16:11

so obviously you didn't see him wiping his bare ass on your seat? that was funny too!

scottishandrew1 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 16:21

lol O-_-O

xoxoMEGANxoxo 13

Tuesday 19 April 2011 16:22

lol I couldn't help but laugh on this one...

I_See_Purple_Ppl 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 16:37

anyone ever stop to think that she maybe one of those types of people that rather own a bike instead of everything that comes along with owning a car? especially the gas prices these days. pretty sure they are high out in cali. not having to gas a car might be how she can afford to go out to eat at a nice place. although the ops idea of a nice place could be something pretty simple such as a coffee shop...