Health, Painful and Intimacy: Up it goes

Up it goes

By 0stvn0 - 16/03/2012 01:18 - Canada

Today, my doctor booked me in for an STI test. I was feeling confident until he explained it will involve having a catheter inserted into my piss pipe. He shook his head sadly and said, "Gonna be honest Steve, the pain's beyond belief." Great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 758

You deserved it 5 691

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/12/2011 14:25 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor's thinking I had a UTI. Turns out I have an STD. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 186

You deserved it 40 098

Ouch

By Anonymous - 01/04/2018 05:00

Today, I went in for an STD test. The Q-tip broke off in my urethra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 540

You deserved it 437

Just in case

By Anonymous - 16/02/2016 07:39 - Australia - Balwyn North

Today, during an unrelated appointment with my GP, he offered me a free check for chlamydia. Despite me reassuring him that I was STI free, he insisted that I should undergo the test. I ended up agreeing, only because I was too embarrassed to admit that I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 392

You deserved it 5 160

Testing testing, one two one two

By regretter - 01/03/2011 01:07

Today, I paid €100 to have a tube shoved down my genitals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 986

You deserved it 7 779

Fingered

By Anonymous - 03/07/2023 19:00 - Finland - Tampere

Today, I went to see a doctor because of some blood in my stool. Not only is the matter embarrassing enough as is, it turned out the doctor was a young, crisply dressed, extremely handsome man. I then had his finger in my ass for a check-up, all the while him being very nice about it. I'm still mortified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 907

You deserved it 215

Tough

By prostate - 08/06/2009 13:48 - United States

Today, I got prostate examination for the first time. Now I can't decide what's worse, the fact that I got a boner when the doctor inserted his finger, or the fact that my wife told the story to pretty much everybody we know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 408

You deserved it 7 057

Prostate implies an Antistate

By artsmart1 - 06/03/2010 00:40 - United States

Today, I went to go see a specialist for my prostate and was told he would have to do an exam before I could leave. Having had this checked just the previous year, I was more than a little irritated. As I was bent over the table the Dr. said, "Now, just pretend I'm Angelina Jolie." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 411

You deserved it 2 947

J'ACCUSE!

By hurtswhenipee3 - 11/01/2023 16:00

Today, I got a urinary tract infection. I didn’t realize men could get those. Worse yet, my girlfriend thinks it’s an STI because, “IF I’M NOT FUCKING YOU, SOMEONE MUST BE!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 107

You deserved it 212

By Jesse - 10/05/2012 21:22 - United States - Bothell

Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor started, he told me that if I found it awkward at all, I should just imagine I was being probed by aliens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 066

You deserved it 2 419

By la poisse - 19/11/2008 05:59 - France

Today, I spent the night in hospital. As soon as I was alone, I writhed and twisted in all directions in my attempts to pee in a bottle left precisely for that purpose. It was at that moment that the doctor, a good-looking guy, came in. My legs were spread wide and I was right in the middle of doing my business. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 032

You deserved it 3 513

YourBuddyElmo 5

Friday 16 March 2012 5:40

On the bright side....nope, nothing's coming to me.

glittercookies 12

Friday 16 March 2012 5:41

It's worth it. You're being responsible and safe.

Comments

MEM0817 18

Friday 16 March 2012 6:42

I'm lost... I've never heard of that being done for STD testing. They can draw your blood and do a swab in your mouth for testing... not have to shove a pipe up your yahoo.

kosherkraut 5

Friday 16 March 2012 6:46

At least he was honest. The nurse told me it wouldn't hurt at all.

geod69 8

Friday 16 March 2012 6:47

Those are not fun

fourthfloor 3

Friday 16 March 2012 6:59

I had a urethra dilation and an endoscopy of my bladder ( looking for possible stones., not any kind of infection) and can tell you it was extremely uncomfortable and painful despite the lidocaine, and I am a girl. So I feel your pain. However this might be a good lesson to start practicing safe sex and avoid the STD to beging with.

ebxr82nv 2

Friday 16 March 2012 6:59

The docs just trying to scare you

shanemcunt 10

Friday 16 March 2012 7:02

Yes it hurts like a bioch! And it will burn when you pee for the rest of the day. Hope you come back clean

murdersquirrel 15

Friday 16 March 2012 7:06

I see words, and punctuation, but I can't make out if there is actually a statement here...

Nyx3ni6m4 5

Friday 16 March 2012 7:19

Other than the tube, theres probably also a bit of cottenswab action. Also why would you think that just because girls get their period and can give birth, it keeps them from having an STD? Seems allot of people who commented think that...

xStaciexLynnx 15

Friday 16 March 2012 13:46

You're an idiot. Nobody said they can't get STDs. They're saying the he should suck it up and deal with the pain because girls have to deal with the pain of periods and birth.

hammerfall26 6

Friday 16 March 2012 7:29

Speaking from experience... He's right

Tidus0 17

Friday 16 March 2012 7:32

It does hurt a little. I had a penile swab. It hurts but doesnt last too long. But think of it your doing the right thing and it's only about 10-20 seconds maybe they are doing it.