Love: Territorial

Territorial

By Anonymous - 27/09/2011 19:53 - United States

Today, a man punched me for sleeping with his wife. Bewildered, I insisted I would never sleep with a married woman, to which he retorted, "She wasn't my wife when it HAPPENED, dumbass!" I was assaulted for sleeping with my own girlfriend three years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 330

You deserved it 4 110

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/08/2012 22:50 - Mexico - Villahermosa

Today, I had the crap beaten out of me by a woman in the street, who accused me of sleeping with her husband. I still don't know who she or her husband are, and I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 050

You deserved it 1 962

It wasn't me!

By Anonymous - 15/03/2015 18:40 - United States - Charleston

Today, a guy beat the crap out of me for supposedly sleeping with his girlfriend. I didn't get a chance to tell him my brother lives with me and that he had the wrong guy. When my brother got home, he didn't ask if I was okay, but rather if the guy was coming back for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 876

You deserved it 2 728

By bad_day_in_hell - 17/11/2009 04:05 - United States

Today, I woke up to a phone call from my boss' wife. She demanded to know how long we'd been sleeping together. When I denied her allegations, she screamed that she knew all about my "history of sleeping with married men". I'm a virgin and I have to work with him tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 148

You deserved it 2 176

Alexa, play "It Wasn't Me" by Shaggy

By Anonymous - 17/09/2019 14:00

Today, I was yelled at and fired by my boss. He claimed that I've been sleeping with his wife. I've never met his wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 295

You deserved it 109

By sad guy - 26/04/2013 05:20 - United States

Today, a huge and angry man stormed into my work and threatened to kill me if I didn't stop sleeping with his wife. He then threatened to come back and kick my ass if I so much as texted his wife again. The problem is, I'm married, have never cheated and I work for my wife's father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 328

You deserved it 3 116

By Anonymous - 18/08/2012 00:20 - United States

Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 549

You deserved it 1 852

Mind your own business

By Anonymous - 16/06/2022 16:00

Today, I caught my best friend's wife being a cheating whore, and I told her either she told him the truth or I would. More fool me, she used the time I gave her to convince him I tried to sleep with her, so now he won’t believe a word I say, and he punched me in the jaw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 218

You deserved it 241

Action - Reaction

By CaptBlood - 21/05/2021 00:01

Today, before I went to work, I wanted to kiss my wife goodbye while she was asleep, She punched me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 838

You deserved it 183

Another case for Shaggy

By well then... - 21/02/2009 23:37 - United States

Today, I was approached by a girl who called me a slut for sleeping with her boyfriend, then punched me in the face. I'm a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 560

You deserved it 3 403

By Ari - 16/06/2011 04:19 - United States

Today, a man came up to me and punched me in the face. He turned out to be the guy my ex-girlfriend cheated on me with. Apparently, she told him we broke up because I used to beat her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 893

You deserved it 3 720

spazzychild 12

Wednesday 28 September 2011 0:08

Punch him for sleeping with your ex-girlfiend.

Babalu722 3

Wednesday 28 September 2011 0:07

wow, thats just messed up

Comments

skyeyez9 24

Wednesday 28 September 2011 3:36

That jerk deserves to be smacked in the teeth with a tire iron.

HU4L188 0

Wednesday 28 September 2011 3:41

That man is a dick hole

dansco 24

Wednesday 28 September 2011 3:50

Call the police on him as assault is still a crime even if you did sleep with his now wife!

Cassikitty 7

Wednesday 28 September 2011 4:03

Why's everybody assuming the guy didn't retaliate physically/legally? If my ex's current partner smacked me for something that happened when my ex and I were together, THAT WOULD SUCK, no matter what sort of subsequent victory I then claimed over them.

sarahlovesyewxD 8

Wednesday 28 September 2011 4:06

I had this discussion in auto cad class today. It is only considered self defense if you defend yourself in a way that is lesser than what the person you are 'defending' yourself from is using. Say that they are going to shoot you, you could disarm them then clock them with the gun and be considered self defense. But you cannot shoot that person in self defense if they are gonna shoot you. Get it?

ndhin831 2

Wednesday 28 September 2011 18:32

Call me crazy but maybe AutoCAD class isn't the best place for legal advice. Self-defense is based on the "reasonable person" standard. Would a reasonable person find the level of force you used in self-defense to be appropriate?

TheLastChild 8

Wednesday 28 September 2011 4:08

Crazy bastard

Darklord53 0

Wednesday 28 September 2011 4:12

Haha I know that feel bro, and I'll tell you about it This super hot girl used to ride my bus to her house (she doesn't now), but my friend and I would always go over and flirt with her. My friend is a super pervert and isn't afraid to be slapped so one day he sit with her and started feeling her up, she had recently gotten out if a relationship where the guy pretty much did the same thing all the time. Anyways, she said she was alright with it so he kept touching her and I was just like Da ****? He then looks at me and says she's cool with it and grabs my hand and puts it on her chest. I was a little shocked so I kept it there for a few seconds then pulled away. He kept feeling her up until she got off. Current Day That girl is my girlfriend and I have beat the shit out of my friend for feeling her up, but we're still close friends.

Darklord53 0

Wednesday 28 September 2011 4:20

Also here's another story Last year on the last day of school I got that super hot girlfriend of mine to stay at school after the graduation ceremony(it's not mandatory to stay afterwords) we hung out around the school, and we found a class with a few people in it so we hung out there. Her douche ex boyfriend that used to feel her up failed the grade so he had to stay at school till the end of the day. He was in that class and started bugging my girlfriend. He took her bag she was carrying and took one of the straps off of it. I went up to him and took it back and walked back to her. He reached around head for the strap so I grab his arm and flip him over my shoulder onto a desk. My gf laughed, the other people laughed too (no one really likes him), the teacher was out of the room at the time it happened so I didn't get in trouble. When the teacher came back in the room the douche's friend told her that I flipped Kyle (the douche) over my shoulder. She said that Kyle deserved it and I still didn't get in trouble.