Health: Today, I accidentally dropped my cigarette down my shirt. There... - FML

By Pain - 28/06/2010 23:37 - United States

Today, I accidentally dropped my cigarette down my shirt. There are now two unsightly, painful burns right in the center of my chest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 002

You deserved it 72 210

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Same thing different taste

Time to go topless I guess...

By aubrey - 14/10/2017 01:30

Today, I accidentally gave myself a chemical burn. It hurts like hell and I've been told all I can do is wait it out for a few days. The worst part? It's from a reaction to a cream I used all over my chest. I can't wear a shirt without being in immense pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 217

You deserved it 329

By Seriously? - 15/05/2013 21:47 - United States - Irvine

Today, while sitting at a red light with my window down, the asshat next to me flicked his still-lit cigarette away. It landed in my car and wedged between me and my seat. It burned a hole in my shirt and my seat, and burned my back and hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 396

You deserved it 3 528

By nimrod23 - 18/10/2009 09:28 - Australia

Today, as I was walking home late at night, some asshole threw a lit cigarette butt out of their balcony. It fell between my glasses and my eye and left a burn mark on my cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 064

You deserved it 2 534

By Anonymous - 08/04/2011 15:30 - United States

Today, I finally found a reason to quit smoking. I threw my cigarette butt out the window and it blew back in, went down the back of my pants, and burnt my butt in 3 different places. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 926

You deserved it 54 303

Testing, testing

By BubbaYoshi117 - 07/01/2020 20:00 - United States - Kirkland

Today, I was refilling my lighter. Afterwards, I gave it a test light. I must've spilled some fluid because my thumb caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 430

You deserved it 1 279

What? Why?

By Anonymous - 16/07/2024 05:00 - United States - Bakersfield

Today, I lit a used tissue on fire in my room. Eventually, the fire became kinda of large (it was a big tissue) and when I blew it out, it fell on the carpet. Now I have a burn stain on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50

You deserved it 1 057

By anonymous - 05/02/2014 02:48 - United States

Today, due to the dry weather, my nose became dry and began to bleed so I plugged it with toilet paper and went about my business. Forgetting about it, I later went out to smoke a cigarette. Not paying attention, I lit the toilet paper on fire as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 925

You deserved it 45 104

This is lit

By a genius - 12/02/2009 13:28 - United States

Today, I lit a cigarette in the opposite direction of the wind. My hair blew into it, and caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 909

You deserved it 60 289

By Anonymous - 07/03/2012 06:29 - United States

Today, I was cooking and I burned my thumb. I had some first-aid burn spray, so I sprayed it on. I went outside to smoke a cigarette, and when I flicked my lighter, my thumb went up in flames. Turns out that first-aid burn spray is flammable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 314

You deserved it 46 090

By Anonymous - 17/07/2009 05:11 - United States

Today, I thought it was a good idea to go number two while smoking a "cigarette". My ash tray was over by the sink so I decided to just ash in the toilet. While ashing between my legs, I sneezed and now I have a extremely uncomfortable burn on my man member. Smoking is bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 439

You deserved it 90 827

Next

Top comments

FFML_314 11

Tuesday 29 June 2010 2:57

OP YDI for smoking

keekah 0

Tuesday 29 June 2010 2:57

Ydi. Don't smoke. It kills you.

Comments

popaii 0

Tuesday 29 June 2010 5:35

yeah80 :) plus ydi for smoking!

disappearingink 0

Tuesday 29 June 2010 5:40

nothing is ****** dude, nothing is ******. c'mon, you're being very un-dude…

ShitYourDickhole 0

Tuesday 29 June 2010 5:44

264- You're cool. Rather live a short,happy,fun life then long hard working,useless one.(: But,cigs are gross,I have better things to kill myself wiith. :D

silentsniper441 0

Tuesday 29 June 2010 5:50

jahahahaha ydi for smoking

ShitYourDickhole 0

Tuesday 29 June 2010 5:50

270- Most 'potheads' I know,are actually pretty smart.Maybe not book smarts....but they're very opinionated,something you actually NEED to be truly sucessful.(: And smoking IS NOT sexy.It's disgusting,you should get that after reading most other comments.(:

Pleasure_Pirate 0

Tuesday 29 June 2010 5:54

Too bad 'opinionated' doesn't get you anywhere in the world. Just because you smoke weed doesn't mean you have to shit on your potential and become a burnout.

immaprincessmadd 0

Tuesday 29 June 2010 5:54

ydi for smoking

SoulessRed 0

Tuesday 29 June 2010 5:57

That's wat you get for smokin

Tempuser117 2

Tuesday 29 June 2010 5:58

I always laugh so hard when these FML's come up. Cause YDI count flies through the roof and the majority of people tell them smoking is bad for them. Smokers burning themselves and setting various cars on fire are always going to get YDI cause if you weren't smoking it wouldn't have happened. I just find this amusing. Carry on. PS. I picked YDI it too. Whee!

imhowie 2

Tuesday 29 June 2010 6:01

Reasons I don't feel bad for you: -Smoking is stupid -Shirts cover up the center of you chest YDI

ShitYourDickhole 0

Tuesday 29 June 2010 6:02

YOU'RE WRONG(:! Opinionated people are the ones who make a difference in the world.Sure,maybe most people won't,but they don't give a shit.(: And i'm ending this laamee argument-Bai Ninjas. ♥

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Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I came home from the minimum-wage job I suffer through to support my now ex-boyfriend's ailing music career. It seems his time management skills suck almost as badly as his music, because I found him in my bedroom, licking whipped cream off my step-sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 855

You deserved it 4 564

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves, so I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview, I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 202 652

You deserved it 52 022

The Top

Today, my husband told me that he is done having sex because it eats up his online gaming time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 006

You deserved it 3 538

Today, I walked out to my car to see a broken window, a bunch of stuff missing, egg shells, and a note that read "stop banging my boyfriend". I haven't had anyone in over a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 093

You deserved it 3 083

Today, I went to get a tattoo of my girlfriend's name to surprise her. Halfway through the tattooing, she called and broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 609

You deserved it 71 881

Today, my girlfriend of two years asked me why I would never tie her shoes for her. I confessed to her my deep hatred of feet. Later, I woke up from a nap next to my girlfriend. With her feet in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 744

You deserved it 6 626

Today, my friend, who had begged me to buy them a plane ticket after being stranded overseas, blocked me. They didn't even use the ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 725

You deserved it 509

Today, my boyfriend spent forty minutes making pasta sauce when we had a perfectly good jar of pasta sauce in the pantry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 93

You deserved it 978