By Anonymous - 10/12/2013 21:06 - United States - Buffalo

Spicy
Today, I found out that I am bleeding from my cervix and must refrain from having sex for the next two weeks. My fiancé pointedly asked if my cervix has anything to do with my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks 57 088
You deserved it 11 028
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Top comments

ComoEsJuan 24

Ask him if his mouth has any connection to his brain. What an ass.

210 23
Jelbeztok 17

if i were you, im pretty sure i'd make him wait a while even after the two weeks.

204 25

Comments

disasteraverted 2

It's a joke. It's a well known joke. There's even an ecard out there with the same joke, probably where your fiance got the idea. now Just have a sense of humour and move on with your life.

23 30
whiskeey 14

Or try having some respect for her.

12 5
deloria_fml 22

Misogyny isn´t funny. Educate yourself. Figure out that women want to be treated like people too, and that men can have enough self-control to realise that their dick isn´t the most important thing in the universe. You´re doing a disservice to both men and women by not realising this.

10 5
xRazzSheri 4

Oh geez... my own fiance makes this joke monthly. He's not a misogynist, he's making a joke. "Misogyny isn't funny", yes lets pull that card... lighten up. The fact that obviously she has something medical going on, perhaps it was a bit insensitive-- but I'm sure it wasn't a serious expectation.

6 12
jefrey 9

Don't merry him he's an asshole you deserve better kik his ass..

2 39
sonnyrosa 32

Please tell me that English isn't your native language...

38 0
cryssycakesx3 22

but tis the season to be merry! kik him? is she going to message him for cyber sex?

15 2
fucMyLifeSoHard 18

There are so many things wrong with that... umm.... sentence? That's what it was supposed to be, right?

5 0
vencku 13

#124 - It's clearly a haiku. You should appreciate this original piece of Japanese art.

8 2
howdoilogin 9

What's so wrong about him asking that? You've got -one- defunct sex orifice. You have two others, a pair of hands, and I'm assuming a couple of breasts. Use this time to experiment, you might learn something.

14 41
xnyletak 17

Why should she now? She's obviously in pain and has a temporary medical condition. If he can't be a sympathetic adult for a couple weeks, he doesn't deserve anything.

41 6
LtBoom 13

I'm sure she would've been more compliant if he actually supported her. He could've simply asked her if she'd be willing to give him a ******* instead of demanding it like an asshole.

18 1
frizz101 22

So 29 what if OP doesn't like blow-jobs or anal? Maybe ops fiancée should realize that OP is not on this earth to satisfy his sexual needs, and if OP was willing to experiment sexually it should be because of a mutual agreement, and not just expected because she cans have sex vaginally.

11 0
hunts19ketchup 23

#132, I have been thinking that same thing this entire time. There are women who really just aren't fans of having dicks in their asses. But for some reason some of the people on here seem to think that if a woman can't have vaginal sex, she are obligated to agree to anal, whether she wants to or not.

9 1
DavidKnows 11

What if he doesn't like ********??? Is that possible?

0 1
Enslaved 36

That's not an original joke. But let's think about it. You, yourself are complaining about not being able to have sex for two weeks. So you feel that he should suffer along with you? Yes, he could have used better tact but like I said it's not an original joke. He has sexual wants-- just like you do. If it's one sided and he doesn't care about your needs then tell him to "**** off". But there is nothing wrong with meeting some middle ground to please one another.

33 30
junkman6 22

#30 your use of logic has upset the thumbs. Stop using common sense and good reasoning. Damn commie.

11 24
cryssycakesx3 22

at least he didn't ask to cheat?

1 11
fucMyLifeSoHard 18

30- Why should OP have to participate at all? Last time I checked, as a man, I have two hands. So unless OP's fiancé is an amputee, he is perfectly capable of giving himself sexual pleasure.

14 2
Nyx_fml 23

Not to mention that OP doesn't seem to be "complaining" about not being able to have sex, but rather about her boyfriend caring more about sex than her health.

16 2
harinakshi 4

"Suffer" because he can't get off for two weeks? What if she comes down with the flu, or any other bad illness or injury or maybe needs surgery for something? In a serious long term relationship things tend to come up that means no sex for awhile. If that's a problem, you shouldn't be in a relationship.

13 1
petro5 6

Maybe he said it in a loving joking way

3 7
jesuismelogee 16

Maybe he should have tried being supportive first...

5 1
Chris93Jones 20

He's dropping unsubtle hints that it's going somewhere else, hint hint.

1 12
purebliss_fml 19

Bleeding from the cervix sounds quite serious and scary! Hope you recover quickly. As for your fiancé... I'd like to think he was joking and is actually sympathetic about your condition! I do understand what you're going through.. After giving birth to my son it was no sex for 6 weeks to give my body time to heal, didn't stop my boyfriend from nagging though!

16 3
bdog525 5

Tell him "no but I'm not supposed to put small things in my mouth"

21 2