Health: Today, I tried drinking "Smart Water" for the first time. I couldn't... - FML

By tstaeger - 24/07/2010 05:20 - United States

Today, I tried drinking "Smart Water" for the first time. I couldn't figure out how to open the bottle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 425

You deserved it 37 823

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Same thing different taste

Fragile

By lithium-dreams - 16/07/2022 22:00

Today, I attempted to open a water bottle. My hand started bleeding before I was able to get the cap loose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 725

You deserved it 160

By Olorin - 07/11/2011 20:49 - Germany

Today, I woke up soaked in water. It seems at some point in the middle of the night, I woke up thirsty and opened the water bottle I keep on my nightstand. I managed to drink a little, but it seems I didn't manage to put the cap back on before losing consciousness again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 862

You deserved it 5 782

But… why would you do that?

By cheerupsookylala - 29/09/2023 14:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I drank water from a random, half-full water bottle I found inside a bumper car (AKA dodgems) at the local fairground, thinking it was mine. It wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 886

By Anonymous - 09/04/2017 20:00

Today, I was running late for my morning gym class. I grabbed a near-empty drink bottle on my way out, intending to fill it up at the gym. Mid-workout, I reached for my bottle and took a big mouthful as I headed over to fill it up. To my great surprise, it was not water but straight vodka. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 565

You deserved it 1 421

By alexander - 08/02/2017 10:00 - United States - Longmont

Today, my girlfriend really needed to take a pee while we were fishing in my boat. Rather than go to shore, she decided to she could just go into a Snapple bottle. I watched as all her pee went straight onto the floor of my boat, soon realizing she had never even taken the bottle's cap off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 719

You deserved it 1 080

Pissed

By whoops - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, I saw that the wine bottle I couldn't open last night had a big hole in the top from my struggle to open it. It was a screw top. I must've been drunker than I thought last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 848

You deserved it 2 515

By Anonymous - 10/01/2011 19:14 - United States

Today, I was drinking a bottle of water. My friend came up from behind and scared me, causing me to inhale and choke on the water. Lacking air, I passed out. I awoke to him on the ground laughing his ass off. I almost drowned drinking a bottle of water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 337

You deserved it 4 365

By sillybrohos - 15/02/2009 06:06 - United States

Today, I spent 2 minutes struggling to cork a wine bottle for one of my tables only to have them eventually point out to me that the bottle was a twist-off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 312

You deserved it 33 802

By stupidity - 25/05/2012 19:30 - Switzerland - Geneva

Today, trying to look cool, I threw my coke bottle in the air, and tried to catch it with one hand. I missed and it fell to the floor. Luckily, it wasn't open, but in my unimaginable stupidity, I opened it less than five seconds later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 780

You deserved it 39 011

Morning pick-me-up

By Anonymous - 30/01/2011 05:05 - United States

Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 966

You deserved it 8 665

Next

Top comments

allmidnighteyes 10

Saturday 24 July 2010 12:52

Water is water is water is water is water. No need buying fancy shit.

FMLephant 2

Saturday 24 July 2010 13:24

can you open a roll of Smarties candy or is that also too difficult?

Comments

3mi1y_ 16

Saturday 24 July 2010 16:47

lol

Lingonberry668 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 17:16

Hahaha look at that irony eh :P Heh.. it happens .. trust me on this one :P

zleake000 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 17:50

dude. righty tighty. lefty loosy.

mockingjay_fml 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 17:51

it opens just like a regular bottle ... :P

alexacheers 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 18:01

really? it's not that hard! haha. &you really need that water(:

mistaken4u 12

Saturday 24 July 2010 18:25

lol

xxJORDISxx_fml 4

Saturday 24 July 2010 18:28

that's the challenge of smart water after you opened it your more smarter than ever lol

lawlatyourfml 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 18:42

you obviously need more than smart water if you can't open a regular bottle. my sister drinks that shit like crazy and i've opened one drunk and half awake. its really not that hard. by any means

scarletscribblez 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 19:03

haha 61! I actually have to say that to myself sometimes when Im opening some bottle.. ya know another one of those times when you suddenly feel stuupid :P Hehe

Combat_Mushroom 3

Saturday 24 July 2010 19:11

smart water for people who arent

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The Top

Today, I asked my girlfriend of six months to be honest and tell me why she didn't give me a chance at first, two years ago when I first asked her out. I guess I shouldn't have asked, because her response was, "At first I wasn't digging you that hard, but the guys I liked didn't have your personality." FML

I agree, your life sucks 142

You deserved it 439

Today, at work at an OB office, I heard a ruckus in the hallway before a very large woman burst into my room and tried to attack my very pregnant patient. Crazy lady is the wife of the pregnant lady’s baby daddy, who is nowhere to be found. I don’t get paid enough for this shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 498

You deserved it 64

The Top

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I came back home in tears, and eventually told my dad what was wrong. He immediately excused himself to the living room, where I heard him tell my mum, "She's gone all Taylor Swift again." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 097

You deserved it 11 663

Today, my girlfriend and I both developed food poisoning from last night's sushi. Our apartment has one bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 316

You deserved it 3 321

Today, my girlfriend claimed she was a Viking because she's pale and has blond hair. She also warned me that if I piss her off she'll go 'berserk' on me. She demonstrated by smacking me in the nuts with a wooden spoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 049

You deserved it 3 560

Today, I posted that I'm having a yard sale and listed a bunch of stuff I'm selling. People started messaging, asking me to send pictures and prices. That's why I'm having the yard sale, so I don't have to post pictures and prices! FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 500

You deserved it 326

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years suggested I don’t display affection or try to hold his hand at a party because a girl there “recently got broken up with” and he doesn’t wanna “hurt her feelings.” When I replied that this was irrational, he told me, “Then don’t come at all stupid bitch, geez!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 460

You deserved it 187

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I didn't call her in the last few days. I tried to explain to her that I was out at my grandfather's house in a remote place with no cell service to stand by him on his death bed. She thought I was making excuses and called me a lying bastard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 879

You deserved it 4 564