By jimmy - 19/08/2011 21:57 - United Kingdom

Spicy
Today, I was diagnosed with crabs. I lost my virginity to my wife, and have never had sex or any sexual contact with anyone but her in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks 53 176
You deserved it 4 530

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Sounds fishy...wait that was a lame pun. That sucks though man.

you do realize you can get crabs other ways than just sex right?

Comments

Hammer940 7

Better break out the old bay seasoning

juicifer 0

"Yeah ya know..I just hit'em with the shampoo.." *Carl*

how is it possible to have had sex with only one person? thats pathetic

No, that's called 'good luck', 'hard work' and 'another moral than you'.

just coz you've been used more times than the buttons on my keyboard doesn't mean that everyone else is the same...

thats ok, i just recently found outnmy mom has herpies

Unless you're having sex with your mom (*shudder*), I don't think that is as big of a problem.

chuko1014 0

this sounds like an episode of HOUSE

nightwolf86 7

Sounds like you married a *****.

jobsman99 0

well here is how you get rid of crabs. shave one side of your pubic hair then set the other half on fire. when the crabs come running out stab them with an ice pick. or like the army song " break out the old blue ointment, much to the crabs disappointment". and then get a daily ******** from your wife.