By Noname - 12/03/2009 11:24 - New Zealand

Spicy
Today, my mom told my boyfriend all about how she had to be a parent volunteer when I was in kindergarten. Apparently I used to masturbate in class by rubbing myself against the edges of chairs and tables. The teacher thought it would be best if my mom was there to make me stop. FML
I agree, your life sucks 157 261
You deserved it 18 045

Same thing different taste

Top comments

LittleMissMack 0

Parents tell embarrassing stories... it happens. I'm sure he's not going to freak out or anything. Maybe he'll think its funny and like you even more because you're obviously a highly sexual individual. =)

That is ******* hilarious... in a pedobear kinda way...

Comments

I used to do stuff like that all the time, haha. Pillows, edges of mattresses.. Kids don't know what it is, but they know it feels good, so they keep doing it. However, my mom would always yell and tell me it was wrong.. How's that for a moral lesson? "Masturbating is wrong. STOP NAO KTHXBAI" And #21.. I used to wish I was a boy, too. Penises looked so much cooler, haha.

carnieofvenice 0

lots of people did it as kids masturbation is only thought of the way it is now because thats how prudes tell you to think about it its natural and there is nothing wrong with it i cant even be friends with people who arent open and comfortable with talking about it

It's extremely common for young children to "**********." I worked at a pre-school and there was a girl in my class who used to rub herself on chairs. I remember doing it too and, like #28, only realizing years later what I'd been doing. Every kid does it. Little boys put their hands in their pockets and little girls rub themselves on things, ain't no shame in it. As long as you're not still doing it in public. :P

34: I'd say it's common and normal, but I wouldn't say that EVERY kid does it - there are kids who don't.

If ur bf brings it up just tell him that its a normal thing for kids to do, & that its embarrassing & would rather not talk about it dont lie to him about it its better not to lie about the little things mainly b/c they arent that big of a deal, & he will get use to the idea of u being untruthful which is very not good

FMLfan26 0

I agree with #33 you gotta be open about sex. Especially with your partner(s). It's HEALTHY! But nonetheless thanks for posting this FML it made me giggle.

It's natural for people to **********, even as children. Why? It feels good, so they instinctively do it. As for your situation, it'll be one of those stories that you laugh about...heh, maybe embarrass your own kid with it one day.

I did that as a child too, its actually relieving to hear about somebody else doing the same thing, I thought I was the only one!! You'll be okay, I'm sure your beau will understand.

I agree with ohfrick- Freud would just nod. We were just studying him today in my Psychology class... it's perfectly normal for kids to play with themselves!