Cigarettes, Cops and Transportation: Chips - FML

Chips

By Anonymous - 13/06/2009 04:09 - United States

Today, I was smoking in my car and flicked the butt… into the face of a cop on a motorcycle going the other way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 005

You deserved it 78 219

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Double down

By Dani_Rich - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was pulled over by a motorcycle cop for speeding in a 25 MPH zone. As the cop was walking towards my car, I flicked my cigarette butt out of my window. So, the cop did me the pleasure of writing me two tickets instead of one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 035

You deserved it 174 503

By Anonymous - 22/01/2017 18:00

Today, I quit smoking cigarettes. While driving to work, the car in front of me flicked his out the window, flying straight into mine. It set the bottom of my seat on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 402

You deserved it 550

By anon - 28/04/2012 14:31 - United States - Washougal

Today, I rear ended a cop while talking on my cell phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 599

You deserved it 91 175

By AmberKCole - 08/07/2009 18:45 - United States

Today, the car in front of me was going slow and I flashed my lights and honked. I floored it and passed the car, flipping off the driver. Just as I went around the next corner I got pulled over by a motorcycle cop. A few seconds later, the guy I flipped off drove by honked and waved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 545

You deserved it 100 542

By Anonymous - 06/12/2010 19:11 - United States

Today, I was smoking while driving. A cop pulled me over and asked if I knew what I did wrong. I thought he could smell the tobacco, so I decided to just admit it. As it turns out, I was going well over the speed limit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 317

You deserved it 39 803

By shit - 13/05/2010 21:00 - United States

Today, I accidentally rear-ended an undercover police car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 981

You deserved it 13 768

By Seriously? - 15/05/2013 21:47 - United States - Irvine

Today, while sitting at a red light with my window down, the asshat next to me flicked his still-lit cigarette away. It landed in my car and wedged between me and my seat. It burned a hole in my shirt and my seat, and burned my back and hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 396

You deserved it 3 528

By Anonymous - 10/10/2009 21:43 - United States

Today, I made the decision to quit smoking while I was driving in my car. So I took my pack, crushed it and threw it out the window. I felt triumphant about this change I was making in my life, until the cop I didn't know was behind me gave me a ticket for littering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 988

You deserved it 46 116

By TheIrony - 19/07/2016 21:50 - United States

Today, while driving I saw a police car riding along next to me. Thinking about the news recently, I decided to give him a quick thumbs up and a smile to lighten up his day. He looks back, smiles, flips on his siren, and pulls me over for not paying attention to the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 182

You deserved it 3 543

This is lit

By a genius - 12/02/2009 13:28 - United States

Today, I lit a cigarette in the opposite direction of the wind. My hair blew into it, and caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 909

You deserved it 60 289

Next

Top comments

pinksplash 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 12:09

You smoke. FYL

katelyns 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 12:08

Hahaha, dumbass!

Comments

purpleiscool 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 3:12

Props to #122 for bringing up the hole in throats. I didn't think of that. Ew remember that commercial that was on TV as a PSA with the lady who had a hole in her throat, and she still smoked?Eww.:(

mehwhateverr 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 3:49

You're a jerk for thinking you're above the law and can flick cigarette butts out the window. Even more so, you're such a jerk you think you can risk other people's lives for your convenience. Many fires are started by cigarette butts that are flicked out of ******* windows. YDI.

likeduhhx4 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 4:12

you deserve it, dont smoke.

Avenging_Angel 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 4:24

YDI for smoking. Seriously.

Ktulu 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 4:25

nice. me and jobb are really drunk and stoned right now, we're going to eat some pizza's right now

Avenging_Angel 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 4:26

YDI for smoking. And thanks so much for trashing the planet. The world is NOT your ashtray... you dumb ass smokers need to realize that!! >_>

MarkO_fml 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 4:48

I could care less if you smoke. What I do care about is you using the world as your ashtray. If your butt bounces off of my car, you will get chased down and beat. Hope it's worth it.

unflawless_fml 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 5:04

serves u right for littering...

textme 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 5:37

Ur stupid haha(:

HAHAHSUCKS4YOU 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 5:44

Hmm "today I was smoking in a car" ydi. Ydi just for smoking ..lung cancers a bitch

10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird Dating AITA Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Fight

The Top

Today, I’ve been getting a lot of strange messages from guys on the dating site I use, then I realised why: on my profile pic I'm sat down and you can see my nice underwear up my skirt. That explains the messages, they thought I was trolling for men to hump and dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 980

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 491

You deserved it 15 057

The Top

Today, my boyfriend took me to a very elegant and expensive restaurant to celebrate our anniversary. When it came to the check, I volunteered to pitch in half, which he rejected by saying, "I got it". Little did I know was that "I got it" was short for "I got your credit card." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 495

You deserved it 3 581

Today, my ex-wife refuses to return to Canada from the Caribbean if there are any new named Covid variants. I don't care about her, but this includes my children. She really does not want to return because she is anti-vax, cannot travel, and likes the local men. So what if the kids don't get educated? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 111

You deserved it 226

Today, after running a couple of miles, I went upstairs into my air-conditioned room to cool off. Apparently, my mom walked past my room and heard me breathing heavily. Later, she had my dad give me a talk about masturbation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 262

You deserved it 3 504

Today, I tried canceling my internet service. The lady on the phone had me on hold for half an hour when, all of a sudden, the call dropped. When I tried phoning back, I was informed that they closed half an hour earlier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 044

You deserved it 339

Today, my friend was telling me about her issues with her boyfriend, and I said, "Damn, that sounds just like a couple I know!" She asked me who, which is when I realised I was actually thinking about Davide and Ekin-Su on Love Island. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 825

Today, while on a date, I desperately let out a stealth fart in my date's car. I didn't have the nerve to own up to it, even as he started panicking and thinking the smell was coming from his engine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 899

You deserved it 8 359