Intimacy: Inappropriate - FML

Inappropriate

By Anonymous - 24/04/2015 19:39 - Ireland - Mountmellick

Spicy

Today, I overheard my uncle talking about me to his friends. Nothing serious, just that he'd fuck me senseless if we weren't related. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 655

You deserved it 3 255

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Same thing different taste

By PrettyScared - 29/07/2013 15:07 - United States - Matthews

Today, my step-brother said to me, "If we weren't related I would fuck you so hard." Mom says I should "be grateful for such a nice compliment." FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 622

You deserved it 6 052

By charlieg9 - 30/08/2013 12:33 - United States - East Meadow

Today, I found out that I'm the creepy uncle of the family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 277

You deserved it 15 866

By Anonymous - 08/11/2015 06:15 - Canada - Gatineau

Today, I overheard my in-laws talking about me. It started off with light insults and ended with, "People like her are the reason murder ain't always wrong". FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 005

You deserved it 2 127

Oh yeah, wait what…?

By Phyllis79 - 28/07/2024 00:00 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I was having lunch with a friend when I went on a rant about how much I really dislike my boss, ranting about all his annoying habits. After a long tirade, my friend looked at me awkwardly and said, "You do realize he's my uncle, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 184

You deserved it 454

By Oops - 04/07/2014 17:35 - United States

Today, I was at the gym, when I saw my uncle at the front desk. I quietly went up behind him and slapped him hard on the back while yelling "What's up, loser?!" He turned around. It wasn't my uncle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 959

You deserved it 43 582

With military bearing

By Pin Chi - 20/02/2022 14:00

Today, my sister’s son, who adores me, started calling me, “my funny uncle.” I was later informed this is also a euphemism for an uncle who molested you. I didn't know, and now he won’t stop saying it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 942

You deserved it 76

Great conversation starter

By balkangirl94 - 23/12/2011 07:42 - United States

Spicy

Today, a guy tried to seduce me by talking about incest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 490

You deserved it 3 736

The long game

By Not this again.... - 26/09/2023 10:00 - United States - Staten Island

Spicy

Today, I visited my Grandma's house, and my uncle happened to be there. As expected, and all the time, he greeted with his signature shit-eating, "I see what you did there" face. He's been doing that to me ever since he saw me masturbating when I was a little kid. I'm 47, married, and have 2 kids now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 482

You deserved it 145

By Anonymous - 29/07/2013 19:07 - United States

Today, I was walking home from the store when I saw my uncle. I went over and gave him a surprise hug. He grabbed my ass. He wasn't really my uncle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 580

You deserved it 21 156

Or does he?

By Anonymous - 09/02/2021 00:30

Today, I read a message from someone on Instagram asking if I wanted to "hook up with a nice guy sometime." It was my uncle – he doesn't recognize his own family before messaging them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 077

You deserved it 65

Next

Top comments

shippingboat 8

Saturday 25 April 2015 8:58

That's equal parts disgusting and terrifying.

Axelerate 23

Saturday 25 April 2015 9:00

You definitely want to follow the buddy system when you're around him

Comments

Emmageen 14

Saturday 25 April 2015 13:20

Definitely something I would my parents right away, no matter how old you are I think you should !

ontheFLY4 25

Saturday 25 April 2015 13:33

If he is your mother's brother, and you take after her, just imagine what she had to deal with living in the same house as him!

jamesrod885 6

Saturday 25 April 2015 13:52

tell his brother that one

jadenjacksonm 14

Saturday 25 April 2015 13:53

that's actually disgusting and disrespectful. sorry he's a creep and an asshole OP :(

ally8 21

Saturday 25 April 2015 13:57

Well look at the bright side; you're related, so he won't. Hopefully.

Koth 14

Saturday 25 April 2015 14:14

Are, are you a man?

VeganDarkLight 31

Saturday 25 April 2015 14:19

No, OP is a woman.

Aimeejasmine 15

Sunday 26 April 2015 2:08

That's the only thing you're picking up on from that FML?

trey600rr 22

Saturday 25 April 2015 14:15

don't think for a second being related will stop him from hitting on you

fantasyworld 37

Saturday 25 April 2015 14:20

That's ****** up.

Hauclir 14

Saturday 25 April 2015 14:25

How flattering.

yosico22 16

Saturday 25 April 2015 14:25

At least it means you're attractive.

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The Top

Today, my Facebook was hacked. The hacker messaged all my online friends, explaining that "I" was overseas, had run out of money and needed help. Not one person cared enough to respond. I guess the hacker picked the wrong target. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 397

You deserved it 5 121

Today, due to my blood pressure, I've begun getting an agonising migraine every time I get increased heart rate from arousal. We’re supposed to be trying for our first baby, but we’ve not had successful sex in weeks because I can’t last until orgasm before I feel like my head is splitting open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 979

You deserved it 168

The Top

Today, I received more affection from my wife in a video game than I ever have in real life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 482

You deserved it 4 395

Today, an elderly gentleman came into my store complaining of a toothache, so I showed him where the Orajel was located. He then insisted on making a big scene, claiming that I really had the magic touch and if I would just stroke his cheek all his pain would go away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 353

You deserved it 2 958

Today, it was our wedding anniversary. My husband takes me and our young son to a family-style chain restaurant. Hoping for a little romance, I ask him what he's excited about in our future, and he says how we shouldn't eat out like this anymore so we can afford to pay our income taxes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 627

You deserved it 4 282

Today, I realised that what I had thought was my dad's default state for the past 17 years is actually his drunken state. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 305

You deserved it 3 399

Today, I farted so loudly I not only woke myself up, but my husband as well. He mistook my gas for someone trying to break in and insisted on checking the whole house. I was too embarrassed to tell him the truth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 254

You deserved it 9 365

Today, I found out the high school I have been doing at home for the past 3 years isn't accredited and doesn't count for anything. I'm 18 and starting high school as a freshman next year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 483

You deserved it 19 629