By RC3Welly - 09/03/2012 22:58 - United States

Spicy
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
I agree, your life sucks 769
You deserved it 1 808
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Top comments

Anony_fml 0

Pull out method doesn't work. You're ****** for life.

872 41

Comments

OMGyoupeople 0

you know what they call people who dont use condoms? PARENTS! its all your fault babe.

9 2
OMGyoupeople 0

#164 and yes it IS his fault- he obviously knew better. you can NOT compare rape to being stupid. He made a decision to have sex without a condom. a girl walking down a dark alley no matter how slutty she looked does not deserve to be forced into having sex. HE was not forced, HE made the decision.

5 4
dantheman_fml 0

AHAHAHHAAHHAHAH # 19 why is every1 talking shit about the pullout method no its not 100% but its even in the little packet of other birth controls and shows that it does work.... just learn to get ur timing right... shit if u HAVE to pull out just pull a superman on that ho.. oh and # 169 who wants to sleep with only one girl??

5 5
blacklily0103 0

pulling out is stupid. it doesn't work. there's a thing called pre-cum and it only takes 1 sperm to get a girl preggers. and sperm fight for their lives to fertilize the egg. it's already too late by the time you pull out.

7 1
audiogasmic 0

HAHAHAHA stupid. pull out doesn't work, haven't you heard of precum? it got my best friend pregnant so don't tell me it can't get you pregnant. that's so ******* hilarious.

9 2
DLBrook 0

I hope you give her an STD.

9 3
tyler1 0

to paraphrase NotoriousMandog's comment from FML #9321: "scream at the top of your lungs while rearing your whole body in preparations for a punch, 'FAAALCOOOON!' And as your make contact with her embryo enriched stomach finish the phrase, 'PAAWWWNCH!' As she's lying on the floor grab the copy of the sex tape you no-doubtingly made the night you conceived the child, that may or may not be alive depending on your ability Falcon Punch, and sell it online to make up some of the cost of this whole revenge expedition." this might help you

6 4
MCart_fml 0

Lol #164 agreed that pull out works at that rate if you only want to prevent pregnancy, but any girl up for unprotected sex on a one night stand should be like a fire alarm going off, she likely already has an STD from doing it before. If he was stupid enough to accept an STD as a PROBABLE consequence and still put it in he deserves anything that happens after that. Women aren't the only ones who need to be smart about how and who they go to bed with.

6 3
Ericboi 0

Actually, you should check if you really are the baby's dad when the baby is born, because I think there is a chance that she's already pregnant, but the dad bailed out, so she's just screwing you over instead.

7 3