Work: Today, I paid for someone else's piss so that I could pass my... - FML

By xharmonyx - 24/04/2012 08:29 - United States

Today, I paid for someone else's piss so that I could pass my drug test. I didn't pass the drug test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 760

You deserved it 71 092

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Same thing different taste

By heck - 12/08/2016 13:57

Today, I took a drug test. Not only did I fail the drug test, but I mostly missed the sample cup and got urine all over my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 153

You deserved it 18 520

By Anonymous - 05/04/2014 23:16 - United States - Windsor Heights

Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling the cup of pee all over myself. I had to explain what had happened, then go sit in a waiting room full of disgusted-looking people, while I kept drinking water to fill my bladder back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 411

You deserved it 6 445

By Confused - 13/05/2013 14:39 - United States - Bath

Today, I was told I would not be getting the job I was offered because I failed my drug test. They never gave me a drug test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 630

You deserved it 3 144

By evomadrid24 - 02/06/2011 02:48 - United States

Today, I had to be an observer for a drug test at work. Me and two others got to watch 130 guys take a piss, and then leave work two hours later than everyone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 180

You deserved it 2 799

By Anonymous - 10/06/2016 17:02 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to take a drug test for my new job, which I desperately need and which took me over a year to land. I got a shy bladder and couldn't pee. They marked me as non-compliant and revoked the job offer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 708

You deserved it 1 317

By overflowing - 16/04/2011 22:20 - United States

Today, I had to take a mandatory drug test with the doctor present. Nervous, I couldn't get myself to pee in the cup right away. When I finally did, I couldn't stop myself from overfilling the cup and getting pee all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 195

You deserved it 8 671

Are you taking the piss?

By Anonymous - 28/05/2019 14:00

Today, I was being drug tested as part of a pre-employment policy for substitute teaching. Once I had peed in the cup enough to pass the line, I put it on the only available space: the toilet paper holder. Trying to get toilet paper, I knocked the cup over, spilling pee all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 520

You deserved it 913

By thinking of military school - 23/10/2016 20:35

Today, I drug tested my son for weed. He purposely filled the cup up to the top out of spite and I got piss all over my hands. Oh, and he failed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 502

You deserved it 3 688

By slaughterteddy - 20/07/2016 23:23 - United States

Today, I spent two hours trying to catch a urine sample whilst at urgent care due to my inability to pee in public restrooms. I finally managed one, and was so excited by my success that I fumbled it and spilled it on my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 040

You deserved it 2 547

Take it up with HR

By Anonymous - 26/08/2024 16:00 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I got fired for failing a drug test for weed. My boss is the one who sells me weed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 581

Next

Top comments

panny10112326 1

Tuesday 24 April 2012 14:53

Why even bother putting FML if you totally deserved it?? Drugs= baaaaad shit.

The_Hitdude 12

Tuesday 24 April 2012 14:54

Yeah... Paying the same friend you rip a bong with to pass a drug test for you isn't a good idea. Must've been high when you agreed to that.

Comments

Brittany1200 2

Tuesday 24 April 2012 15:44

Haha fail much? Next time get it from someone who DOESN'T do drugs hun :P

macgyver2009 4

Tuesday 24 April 2012 15:44

Freaking cry baby don't do drugs and you won't have a problem then.

mk58 31

Tuesday 24 April 2012 15:44

I sincerely feel like smacking some sense into you.

chels1994 11

Tuesday 24 April 2012 15:49

I'd love to know how you don't deserve this

THE_A_TEEN 27

Tuesday 24 April 2012 15:58

Or, just don't do drugs.

mintcar 9

Tuesday 24 April 2012 16:00

So you got your money taken away and still got in trouble. Yep, sounds like YDI. Stay drug free and you won't have a problem.

br0ccoli 14

Tuesday 24 April 2012 16:00

I don't even know what to say to this. Drugs are bad. Alcohol good?

MyssMarsh 11

Tuesday 24 April 2012 16:03

How much did you pay?

immaMonsta 8

Tuesday 24 April 2012 16:07

Lol, and you came on here expecting sympathy? I don't even know why some people voted FYL for this FML. You totally deserve it. Drugs are bad for you, idiot.

obeliks 4

Tuesday 24 April 2012 16:10

Stupid fcuk

THE_A_TEEN 27

Tuesday 24 April 2012 16:39

^Irony, eh.

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I agree, your life sucks 283

You deserved it 1 012

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I agree, your life sucks 313

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