By burritobreasts - 15/10/2014 06:27

Today, I woke up to my roommate trying to put a burrito and a pack of mild sauce in between my boobs. He's only lived here for two weeks, and this is the second time I've woken up to him doing something like this. FML
I agree, your life sucks 44 148
You deserved it 5 318

Same thing different taste

Top comments

time to change the roommate... or lock your room always

saucyrossi 18

Comments

Okay this is NOT normal, and unless he is a prankster/ old friend you're overally casual with you seriously need to boot him out.

Yes, glad someone thinks they may be best friends and in a prank war. I think this may be the case because she didn't word the FML like it was a crazy psycho and she was scared. I seriously hope for Op's sake that this is the case! Otherwise that is pretty creepy.

so wait...you're saying that some guy that you have only know for two weeks keep trying to shove things between your breasts while you sleep? Like touching you, while you sleep? Right? That's what you're saying? Right? Hon, you need to kick his ass out! and get a restraining order! If not more....

WasabiMars 21

You can deter the said creepy room mate by hiding a couple of pepper spray nearby. This is so that if your room mate finds the pepper spray, you'd have a back-up. Maybe one under the pillow, another hidden behind the lamp, another under the bed, etc. Then spray away. Mousetraps also work. If it's not enough you can always run a mild electrical current through your doorknob but remember to switch off the current before you touch it yourself.

LittleRed79 39

Haha! I'm picturing OP sleeping with mousetraps between her boobs.

WasabiMars 21

One would normally think to place mousetraps on the floor for the room mate to step on since it won't be seen with all the (presumably) lights off while sleeping in at night. Well... your perspective of boobie-mousetraps may be good, too... maybe.

Every girl's dream it is to have breakfast in bed. And you're bitching about it

Call the cops first... and then landlord if you have one. Maybe an attorney? I don't know. But you're gonna need as much legal advising as you can get to make sure this guy goes away and stays away.

Hun, you need to skip everything else and call the police. Like. Now. His psychology is complex. You don't wanna screw around with it. Cut him off. Now. What he's doing is sick. You're at your most vulnerable (asleep), he's going into YOUR room, doing things to YOUR body, and satisfying some weirdass fetish.. WITHOUT your consent. There is NO excuse for what he's doing. Period.

"His psychology is complex" lmao thank you for being inadvertently hilarious

was it cooked or frozen? I'm a little intrigued. and why don't you either kick him out or put a lock on your door

rocker_chick23 27

Kick him out. He is a ******* pervert, and there is no telling what he will do next.