Love: Are you OK?

Are you OK?

By unicorn - 12/06/2009 16:49 - United States

Today, I went on a date with my boyfriend. Suddenly he starts speaking gibberish. I ask what's wrong? He says, "I was just talking to my unicorn. He says you're pretty," and winks at me. What have we learned today? The person I like is a freak, and apparently unicorns are real. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 752

You deserved it 13 280

Halloween: Terror and Laughter
Discover stories that combine fright and humor for an unforgettably funny Halloween. More…

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Same thing different taste

By kat - 21/02/2012 09:53 - Reserved

Today, a client stared at me in disbelief after I mentioned that I had a boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 726

You deserved it 3 059

By shastadoe - 06/08/2012 06:37 - United States - Los Banos

Today, my boyfriend told me he was a vampire. I burst out in laughter and said he was ridiculous. He looked at me in disgust and said he couldn't be with someone who didn't trust and believe in him. I'm now single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 621

You deserved it 5 862

By NocturnalFox - 25/08/2015 19:46 - Czech Republic - Plzen

Today, I went on a first date with my crush. Right before the date, I noticed a monstrous pimple in the middle of my forehead. I covered it with make-up, but it was still visible. The guy spent the whole evening laughing at me and telling me that I look like an unicorn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 920

You deserved it 2 207

Never again

By Catsfordays - 20/08/2015 06:02 - United States - Yucaipa

Today, I went on a date with someone I considered a real catch, my potential soulmate even. He ended up telling me about his fetish for "female smells", sang loudly in Italian in a crowded restaurant, and ate most of the food on my plate. Man, fuck dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 941

You deserved it 2 633

By Anonymous - 24/08/2014 04:14 - United States

Today, a guy took me out on a date. His imaginary friends joined us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 281

You deserved it 3 679

By unicorn - 13/09/2011 21:21 - United States

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 739

You deserved it 12 911

Tonight, on First Dates…

By Anonymous - 19/03/2023 22:00 - Australia

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I really liked. He spent the whole time talking about his pet iguana and how it's the love of his life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 819

You deserved it 171

Another one?

By Anonymous - 27/04/2012 15:24 - United States

Today, I found out the guy I've been crushing on for many years thinks he's a werewolf. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 924

You deserved it 4 863

Sounds like a keeper

By Rae - 30/03/2023 10:00

Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed really nice. However, halfway through the date, he started talking about how he was a flat-earther, and believed that the moon landing was faked. Oh, and that birds aren't real. I had to endure another hour of his conspiracy theories before I could finally escape. FML

I agree, your life sucks 822

You deserved it 141

Red flag

By Ugly - 06/03/2022 06:00

Today, I went to a wedding with my boyfriend. He became moonstruck with one my friends and said she looked sexy in her dress. The whole night, I was nonexistent to him. He’s now confused as to why I’m giving him the silent treatment. He literally has no clue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 054

You deserved it 344

jorvid 0

Friday 12 June 2009 23:17

First of all unicorns is real, and you should be grateful that the unicorn even thought you were worthy of a compliment, you ****!

24788 6

Friday 12 June 2009 23:16

What's wrong with having imaginary friends that you talk to?

Comments

amiss 2

Monday 15 June 2009 13:23

How is he your boyfriend already if you don't even know him well enough to know THIS basic stuff about him? He's not your boyfriend if you're still just "dating."

ABDNR_x_13 0

Monday 15 June 2009 18:51

hahahahahaha. wow. the worst part is.. i could use this. mine is exactly like this.. he DOES believe in unicorns ANDDD he is a bit.. 'odd' i feel yah on this.. don't worry about it. he's trying to be cute around you instead of a big tough guy. keep him (:

Kc_flapjack 0

Monday 15 June 2009 19:23

If you don't want your boyfriend, I'll take him =3

exile529 0

Monday 15 June 2009 20:46

i really don't see a problem here. sounds like a fun person to have a drink with though, hahahah.

LOLYLIF 0

Monday 15 June 2009 23:30

Heh. My friend Kyle thinks you're an idiot, and he would know, being a griffin and all...

ultravioletbaby 0

Tuesday 16 June 2009 4:16

I'm with #20.

ohekno 0

Tuesday 16 June 2009 6:01

Haha thats the most original yet cheesy thing I'ver ever heard. How awkwardly adorable =) WHAT AN OXYMORON. Lucky you

hijihi 0

Sunday 26 July 2009 9:55

Nice Adventure Time reference! Also, the OP shouldn't be such a patoot!

BreezyPear 0

Tuesday 16 June 2009 7:10

Where the hell did you find this guy?? The mental institution? Lmao, does he have a long-sleeved shirt that makes him hug himself??

jessindsey 0

Wednesday 17 June 2009 8:31

unicorns get hurt when u say their not real.. they die a little bit inside each time you say they're not real. For example have you ever seen charlie the unicorn and those othet two unicorns on youtube. That is a perfect example that unicorns actually exist. Can you open you mind a little and just go with it.? (:

antar_fml 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 1:59

err ... how is that supposed to show your life's ****** up . Unless of course you admit your lack of appreciation of originality to be the problem ... btw , theoretically speaking ... the possibility of existence of unicorns would be the same as the possibility of god's existence . Having a believe doesn't make you crazy , more than half of the world's population would be crazy if that weren't true..... and for the record , i am an atheist and i don't believe in unicorns :P