By Anonymous - 23/01/2011 00:12 - United States

Spicy
Today, my girlfriend, who's on a diet, refused to give me a blow job because my sperm would "add useless calories" to her day. FML
I agree, your life sucks 41 544
You deserved it 14 764
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

jibz 6

Should've mentioned sex, it's a great calorie burner.

127 3

Comments

iloveadp 0

wow f your girlfriend's life cause you're an asshole

4 4
thebigslim 13

Obviously you need to educate her about the protein content of sperm...... 1 tablespoon of the stuff is around the protein equivalent of a 72 ounce steak. Last I checked protein = good for diet.

1 4
Thecarpaltunnelo 0

Oh, yes. Your life is just so effed because you couldn't get a *******. GET OVER IT.

8 4
match21 0

what a tard just tell her to not swallow

1 3
attatood 8

A typical ejaculation fills up about one teaspoon; the actual amount is determined by a man's age (younger men usually make more semen), when he last ejaculated, and how long he's aroused before ejaculating, among other factors. Contrary to what you've heard, semen is not loaded with calories. Each teaspoon of ejaculate has about 5 - 7 calories and some 200 - 500 million sperm. Since sperm make up only about 1 percent of semen, what accounts for the other 99 percent? Well, its other ingredients include: Fructose sugar Water Ascorbic acid (a.k.a., vitamin C) Citric acid Enzymes Protein Phosphate and bicarbonate buffers (bases) Zinc Can swallowing semen enrich a poor diet? Unless you're gulping gallons of it each day, it's no substitute for real nutritious cuisine. It won't make you fat either.

11 1
Jackmangold 0

do you mean tablespoon instead of teaspoon? it's kinda hard to believe the average is only one teaspoon that's pretty damn small

0 0
attatood 8

Yeah, I thought so too. I'm a guy and i have alot more than that. I copied some of the info from a Google search so I thought maybe I was above average... but probably not huh?

0 0
RyNo24 4

**** her in the ass! that won't add calories!

0 1
LoWalt 3

tell her sperm strengthens your teeth:)

1 2
Black_Magic87 0

Teach her the protein packed side of the sperm

0 0